England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Hamley Church had, in former days, been collegiate, and was, in
consequence, much larger and grander than the majority of country-town
churches. The Ford Bank pew was a square one, downstairs; the Ford Bank
servants sat in a front pew in the gallery, right before their master.
Ellinor was "hardening her heart" not to listen, not to hearken to what
might disturb the wound which was just being skinned over, when she
caught Dixon's face up above. He looked worn, sad, soured, and anxious
to a miserable degree; but he was straining eyes and ears, heart and
soul, to hear the solemn words read from the pulpit, as if in them alone
he could find help in his strait. Ellinor felt rebuked and humbled.
She was in a tumultuous state of mind when they left church; she wished
to do her duty, yet could not ascertain what it was. Who was to help her
with wisdom and advice? Assuredly he to whom her future life was to be
trusted. But the case must be stated in an impersonal form. No one, not
even her husband, must ever know anything against her father from her.
Ellinor was so artless herself, that she had little idea how quickly and
easily some people can penetrate motives, and combine disjointed
sentences. She began to speak to Ralph on their slow, sauntering walk
homewards through the quiet meadows:
"Suppose, Ralph, that a girl was engaged to be married--"
"I can very easily suppose that, with you by me," said he, filling up her
pause.
"Oh! but I don't mean myself at all," replied she, reddening. "I am only
thinking of what might happen; and suppose that this girl knew of some
one belonging to her--we will call it a brother--who had done something
wrong, that would bring disgrace upon the whole family if it was
known--though, indeed, it might not have been so very wrong as it seemed,
and as it would look to the world--ought she to break off her engagement
for fear of involving her lover in the disgrace?"
"Certainly not, without telling him her reason for doing so."
"Ah! but suppose she could not. She might not be at liberty to do so."
"I can't answer supposititious cases. I must have the facts--if facts
there are--more plainly before me before I can give an opinion. Who are
you thinking of, Ellinor?" asked he, rather abruptly.
"Oh, of no one," she answered in affright. "Why should I be thinking of
any one? I often try to plan out what I should do, or what I ought to
do, if such and such a thing happened, just as you recollect I used to
wonder if I should have presence of mind in case of fire."
"Then, after all, you yourself are the girl who is engaged, and who has
the imaginary brother who gets into disgrace?"
"Yes, I suppose so," said she, a little annoyed at having betrayed any
personal interest in the affair.
He was silent, meditating.
"There is nothing wrong in it," said she, timidly, "is there?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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