A friend of mine who knew that he was going deaf conceived the brilliant scheme of saying “Yes,” or nodding his head to agree with everything that was said to him. He felt that the path of least resistance lies along the affirmative—in letting others always have the say. One day he settled himself in the first vacant chair in a barber shop, at the mercy of a very talkative barber, with whom expression of thought had become merely a vocal exercise. My friend knew that this man was talking and asking questions, but as he could hear nothing, he merely nodded at each evident interrogation point. He had some important work on hand which he was trying to develop, and, as is the habit of the deaf at such times, he became absorbed in his thought and quite unmindful of what the barber was doing. At each questioning look he emerged from his brown study only long enough to nod his head. Finally the barber finished, and presented a check for about three dollars. It then appeared that instead of asking the usual questions about the weather and business the man had been talking hair cut, singeing, facial massage, moustache curling, hair renewer, and all the rest. Delighted at such a model customer, the loquacious barber had done his full duty. Nothing but that special Providence which guards fools and deaf men had saved my friend from the bootblack, the vibrator and the manicure girl. I recently read in the daily paper of a lawsuit in which a man sued his barber to recover $4.75 obtained in just this way—the plaintiff being a deaf man. The justice decided against the barber on the ground that a man cannot legally be said to order a service unless he knows what it is going to be. So, score another for the deaf man. This and similar experiences convinced my deaf friend that the road to affirmation is well lined with a group of citizens who do far more than hold out their hats for charity. No deaf man is safe on that highway. So he changed his method and shook his head at all questions. He said that experience had convinced him that at best this is a selfish world, and most men approached him seeking some advantage rather than offering service: therefore a general negative was the best policy. Shortly after making this decision he attended a reception at a wealthy man’s country home. At one stage of the proceedings the men were all invited into a side room, where a very dignified butler marched about and whispered to each guest in turn. My friend ran true to form and shook his head. In a short time a fine drink was served to everyone except himself.