“Well--well--” Babbitt sought for adequate expression of his admiration.
“I’m a son of a gun! I knew this correspondence-school business had
become a mighty profitable game--makes suburban real-estate look like
two cents!--but I didn’t realize it’d got to be such a reg’lar
key-industry! Must rank right up with groceries and movies. Always
figured somebody’d come along with the brains to not leave education to
a lot of bookworms and impractical theorists but make a big thing out
of it. Yes, I can see how a lot of these courses might interest you. I
must ask the fellows at the Athletic if they ever realized-- But same
time, Ted, you know how advertisers, I means some advertisers,
exaggerate. I don’t know as they’d be able to jam you through these
courses as fast as they claim they can.”
“Oh sure, Dad; of course.” Ted had the immense and joyful maturity of a
boy who is respectfully listened to by his elders. Babbitt concentrated
on him with grateful affection:
“I can see what an influence these courses might have on the whole
educational works. Course I’d never admit it publicly--fellow like
myself, a State U. graduate, it’s only decent and patriotic for him to
blow his horn and boost the Alma Mater--but smatter of fact, there’s a
whole lot of valuable time lost even at the U., studying poetry and
French and subjects that never brought in anybody a cent. I don’t know
but what maybe these correspondence-courses might prove to be one of the
most important American inventions.
“Trouble with a lot of folks is: they’re so blame material; they don’t
see the spiritual and mental side of American supremacy; they think that
inventions like the telephone and the areoplane and wireless--no, that
was a Wop invention, but anyway: they think these mechanical
improvements are all that we stand for; whereas to a real thinker, he
sees that spiritual and, uh, dominating movements like Efficiency, and
Rotarianism, and Prohibition, and Democracy are what compose our deepest
and truest wealth. And maybe this new principle in education-at-home may
be another--may be another factor. I tell you, Ted, we’ve got to have
Vision--”
“I think those correspondence-courses are terrible!”
The philosophers gasped. It was Mrs. Babbitt who had made this discord
in their spiritual harmony, and one of Mrs. Babbitt’s virtues was that,
except during dinner-parties, when she was transformed into a raging
hostess, she took care of the house and didn’t bother the males by
thinking. She went on firmly:
“It sounds awful to me, the way they coax those poor young folks to
think they’re learning something, and nobody ’round to help them
and-- You two learn so quick, but me, I always was slow. But just the
same--”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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