Next set up desirable candidate, unless you can get candidate to set them up himself, slug the standing galley, oil the cross-head, upset the tripod, loosen the crown sheet a little, so that the obvious duplex will work easily in the lallygag eccentric, and turn on steam. Should the box in which the lower case candidates are stored get hot, sponge off and lubricate with castor oil, antifat and borax in equal parts. Keep this song in a cool place.= ```(Air--_Rally Round the Flag, Boys_.) ```Oh, we'll gather from the hillsides, ````We'll gather from the glen, ```Shouting the battle cry of...., ```And we'll round up our voters, ```Our brave and trusty men, ````Shouting the battle cry of....= `````Chorus.= ```Oh, our candidate forever, ````Te doodle daddy a, ```Down with old..., ```Turn a foodie diddy a, ```And we'll whoop de dooden do, ````Fal de adden adden a, ```And don't you never forget it. ```Oh, we'll meet the craven foe` ```On the fall election day, ```Shouting the battle cry of..., ```And we'll try to let him know` ``That we're going to have our way,` ```Shouting the battle cry of,= `````Chorus.= ```Oh, our candidate forever, etc.= ```Oh, we're the people's friends, ````As all can plainly see, ```Shouting the battle cry of...,` ``And we'll whoop de dooden doo, ```With our big majority, ````And don't you never forget it.= `````Chorus.= ```Oh, our candidate forever, etc. SITTING ON ON A VENERABLE JOKE. |Near St. Paul, on the Sioux City road, I met the ever-present man from Leadville again. I had met him before on every division of every railroad that I had traveled over, but I nodded to him, and he began to tell me all about Leadville. He saw that I looked sad, and he cheered me up with little prehistoric jokes that an antiquarian had given him years ago. Finally he said: "Leadville is mighty cold; it has such an all fired altitude, The summer is very short and unreliable, and the winter long and severe. "An old miner over in California gulch got off a pretty good joke about the climate there. A friend asked him about the seasons at Leadville, and he said that there they had nine months winter and three months late in the fall." Then he looked around to see me fall to pieces with mirth, but I restrained myself and said: "You will please excuse me for not laughing at that joke. I cannot do it. It is too sacred. "Do you think I would laugh at the bones of the Pilgrim Fathers, where are they? or burst into wild hilarity over the grave of Noah and his family? "No, sir; their age and antiquity protect them. That is the way with your Phoenician joke.