Mr Stoddart blinks our problem altogether. Fish, it will be noticed,
are treated, firstly, as bits of cork, and, secondly, as lumps of
lead. But the bad example of all the great men before or since
Agamemnon will not lessen the cruelty, if it be cruelty, of dragging a
large fish or a little fish out of its "native element" forcibly, and
against its will. Obliging a fish to come out of the water when it has
not the slightest wish to be a fish out of water, has an apparent
resemblance to the ejecting of a human being unseasonably from his bed
who has made up his mind to prosecute a steady snooze for the next
three hours. The absence or presence of a little bodily suffering in
the process of ejection, has really nothing to do with the merits of
the abstract question. A man who is jerked out of bed by a string
tied to his toe must endure an uncomfortable twinge. But the votary of
Morpheus may be induced to change his quarters quite as effectually by
painlessly removing beyond his reach the blankets and the sheets. It
is not the application of positive compulsion to the person, but the
disturbance of existing comfort in his present condition, which may be
pain, and hardship, and cruelty. In point of fact, it is nothing of
the sort, because the analogy, as stated, is entirely fallacious. The
true analog is to be stated thus: Any body who, being already in bed,
and therefore legitimately somniferous, happens to overhear us in the
next room loudly declaring our intention of beginning forthwith a
supper of savoury and palatable dishes, and who, thereupon, greedily
shakes off his incipient torpidity, and rushes into the apartment in
order to share the banquet, but finds no supper, and ourselves
laughing at his credulity, has no right at all to assert that he has
been subjected to hardships or treated with cruelty. He left his
proper sphere, and was punished for his eccentricity. How is a fish
that lives in the water entitled to snap at a fly that lives out of
the water? But then the fly goes into the water. Very well: but if the
fish comes up into the air, as it does, to bite at a fly, which is a
denizen of the air, it is just that a fly, when it goes down into the
water, should indulge in a reciprocal bite at a fish, which is a
denizen of the waters. And if flies cannot bite for themselves, it is
a noble thing in man to bite for them. All the fish encreeled by all
the human fishers of every year make but a molehill to the mountain of
flies butchered and gorged by a single trout in a month. Heliogabalus
was temperate, Nero was merciful, when compared with a gillaroo. And
as for a PIKE!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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