Adultery -- Fiction; Artists -- Fiction; Illegitimate children -- Fiction; Painters -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
“My mother’s name is Rebecca,” said Helge. “I think it sounds hard, too.
My sister’s name is Sophy. She married only to get away from home, I am
sure, and have a place of her own. I wonder mother could be so delighted
to get her married, considering the cat-and-dog life she herself has led
with my father. But there was no end of a fuss about the Rev. Arnesen,
when my sister got engaged to him. I can’t stand my brother-in-law,
neither can father, I believe, but mother!...
“My fiancée—I was engaged once, you know—her name was Catherine, but she
was always called Titti. I saw she had that name put into the papers,
too, when her marriage was announced.
“It was a stupid thing altogether. It was three years ago. She was
giving some lessons in the school where I was teaching. She was not a
bit pretty, but she flirted with everybody, and no woman had ever taken
any notice of me—which you can easily understand, when you think of me
as I was here at first. She always laughed at everything—she was only
nineteen. Heaven knows why she took to me.
“I was jealous, and it amused her. The more jealous she made me, the more
in love was I. I suppose it was less love than male vanity, having a
sweetheart very much in demand. I was very young then. I wanted her to be
exclusively taken up with me—a very difficult proposition as I was then.
I have often wondered what she wanted me for.
“My people wanted our engagement to be kept secret, because we were so
young. Titti wanted it made public, and when I reproached her for being
too much interested in other men, she said she could not spend all her
time with me, as our engagement was a secret.
“I took her home, but she could not get on with my mother. They always
quarrelled, and Titti simply hated her. I suppose it would have made
no difference to mother if I had been engaged to somebody else; the
fact that I was going to marry was enough to put her against any woman.
Well—Titti broke it off.”
“Did it hurt you very much?” Jenny asked quietly.
“Yes, at the time. I did not quite get over it till I came here, but I
think it was mostly my pride that suffered. Don’t you think that if I had
loved her really, I should have wished her to be happy when she married
another? But I didn’t.”
“It would have been almost too unselfish and noble,” said Jenny, smiling.
“Oh, I don’t know. That is how you ought to feel if you really love.
Don’t you think it is strange that mothers never care for their sons’
sweethearts? They never do.”
“I suppose a mother thinks no woman is good enough for her boy.”
“When a daughter gets engaged it is quite different. I saw that in the
case of my sister and the fat, red-haired clergyman. There was never much
sympathy between my sister and myself, but when I saw that fellow making
love to her, and thought that he.... Ugh!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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