Solomon sat in all his glory upon the great throne of ivory and gold, flanked by the twelve brazen lions of the zodiac, and the Knights of the Mystic Shrine of Asherah in dazzling regalia guarded the beloved of the Lord. Around the throne, with naked swords and the three hundred golden shields, stood the Princes of the Tribes of Israel, as the rays of the setting sun, reflected from the jeweled walls of cedar and gold, bathed in dazzling light the royal panoplies of blue and purple and crimson. And King Solomon’s sacred, hermaphrodite Billygoat, in trappings of purple and gold, wearing ribbons on his horns and ribbons on his tail, stood beside the golden throne with his revered back to the audience in accordance with the law in such case made and provided. And he informed the King in no uncertain words that he did not propose to be the goat any longer, that the Knights of the Mystic Shrine of Asherah, that had been assigned as priests to serve him, one of the highest gods, drank up all the wine sacrificed to him, and thus prevented him from getting as full as a goat, as required by the tenets of his religion. And further, they did not give him exercise enough, they called him Baphomet and Devil and other hard names and took him up out of the pit for a walk around the town only once a month, at dead of night, in the dark of the moon, when Hell yawns, and the graves give up their dead. Upon the conclusion of this divine oration, the whole audience crawled on their hands and knees up the steps of the golden throne and devoutly kissed the back of Baphomet, as we kiss the male and female emblems on the Pax. This pious ceremony being completed, the Great King, raising the royal sceptre, summoned to his exalted presence the Commander of the Knights of the Mystic Shrine of Asherah and said: “While you, Benaiah, my faithful servant, go and kill Adonijah, my well beloved brother, I will hie me to my devotions, for I can see that at the mystic shrine on yonder hilltop, the luscious Asherah is yearning for me. My adored, my most beautiful, my ravishing one stands in the open door of the pagoda, the beautiful gate ajar, stands there in all her pristine loveliness, a beauty unadorned, young and plump and enchanting. See that innocent radiant face beaming with loving kindness, perfect in every feature, see that form divine, of which the gods in Heaven do envy me. She is my favorite nun, the incarnation of the Divine Asherah, and she is calling me to prayer. See her beckoning me over with that sweet hand, that angel hand that holds me, the King of the Earth and Sea, a willing slave in its gentle grasp. She says the door is open wide, and all who will may enter in, and no one is denied.”