Wilfred hesitated. But what was to be done? Solitude and homesickness
had perhaps distorted his vision; at any rate he had succumbed to the
folly against which he had been warned. He could not accept Lahoma as
a mere child; and though, during the scene, he had repeatedly reminded
himself that she was only fifteen, her face, her voice, her form, her
manner of thought, refused the limits of childhood. Therefore he went
away, outwardly well-content with his morning, but inwardly full of
wrath that his heart had refused the guidance of his mind.
And she had been so simple, so eager to meet him on an equal plane,
even clinging to him as to the only hope in her narrow world that might
draw her out into deeper currents of knowledge.
"I've always been a fool," he muttered savagely, as he sought his
horse. "I was a fool about Annabel--and now I'm too big a fool to
enjoy what fortune has fairly flung in my path." Presently he began to
laugh--it was all so ridiculous, beating a retreat because he could not
regard a fifteen-year-old girl as a little child! He drew several
time-worn letters from his pocket and tore them into small bits that
fluttered away like snowflakes on the wind. He had no longer a
sentimental interest in them, at all events.
CHAPTER XII
THE BIG WORLD
He did not come again. Lahoma used to go to the hill-island, which she
called Turtle Hill because the big flattened rocks looked like turtles
that had crawled up out of the cove to sun themselves; among these
turtles she would lie, watching the open mouth of the mountain
horseshoe in the vain hope that Wilfred would appear from around the
granite wall. Occasionally she descended to the plain and scanned the
level world, but it was pleasanter to watch from the cove because one
never knew, while in that retreat, who might be coming along the range.
On the plain, there were no illusions.
Lahoma courted illusions. And when she knew that Wilfred Compton had
severed connections with Old Man Walker she merely exchanged one hope,
one dream, for another. The opportunity to learn about the big world
was withdrawn; but the anticipation of one day meeting Wilfred again
was as strong as ever. She made no secret of this expectation.
Bill Atkins sought to dismiss it effectually. "You don't know about
the big world, Lahoma," he declared, "if you think people meet up with
each other after they've once lost touch. If all this part of America
was blotted out of existence, people in the East wouldn't miss any ink
out of the ink-bottle."
Lahoma tossed her head. "Maybe the world IS big," she conceded. "But
if Wilfred isn't big enough to make himself seen in it when I go
a-looking, I don't care whether I meet him again or not. When I'm in
the big world, I expect to deal only with big people."
"I saw no bigness about HIM," Bill cried slightingly.
"If he isn't big enough to make himself seen," Lahoma serenely
returned, "I won't never--"
"You won't ever--" Bill corrected.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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