England -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Repression (Psychology) -- Fiction; Single women -- Fiction; Women -- England -- Fiction
Harriett made her way between the chairs, dim-eyed, upright, and stiff
in her white shawl. She apologized for having waited seven years before
calling.... “Never go anywhere.... Quite a recluse since my father’s
death. He was Hilton Frean.”
“Yes?” Mrs. Brailsford’s eyes were sweetly interrogative.
“But as we are such near neighbors I felt that I must break my rule.”
Mrs. Brailsford smiled in vague benevolence; yet as if she thought that
Miss Frean’s feeling and her action were unnecessary. After seven years.
And presently Harriett found herself alone in her corner.
She tried to talk to Mr. Brailsford when he handed her the tea and bread
and butter. “My father,” she said, “was connected with _The Spectator_
for many years. He was Hilton Frean.”
“Indeed? I’m afraid I--don’t remember.”
She could get nothing out of him, out of his lean, ironical face, his
eyes screwed up behind his glasses, benevolent, amused at her. She was
nobody in that roomful of keen, intellectual people; nobody; nothing but
an unnecessary little old lady who had come there uninvited.
Her second call was not returned. She heard that the Brailsfords were
exclusive; they wouldn’t know anybody out of their own set. Harriett
explained her position thus: “No. I didn’t keep it up. We have nothing
in common.”
She was old--old. She had nothing in common with youth, nothing in
common with middle age, with intellectual, exclusive people connected
with _The Spectator_. She said, “_The Spectator_ is not what it used to
be in my father’s time.”
Harriett Frean was not what she used to be. She was aware of the
creeping fret, the poisons and obstructions of decay. It was as if she
had parted with her own light, elastic body, and succeeded to somebody
else’s that was all bone, heavy, stiff, irresponsive to her will. Her
brain felt swollen and brittle, she had a feeling of tiredness in her
face, of infirmity about her mouth. Her looking-glass showed her the
fallen yellow skin, the furrowed lines of age.
Her head dropped, drowsy, giddy over the week’s accounts. She gave up
even the semblance of her housekeeping, and became permanently dependent
on Maggie. She was happy in the surrender of her responsibility, of
the grown-up self she had maintained with so much effort, clinging to
Maggie, submitting to Maggie, as she had clung and submitted to her
mother.
Her affection concentrated on two objects, the house and Maggie, Maggie
and the house. The house had become a part of herself, an extension
of her body, a protective shell. She was uneasy when away from it.
The thought of it drew her with passion: the low brown wall with the
railing, the flagged path from the little green gate to the front
door. The square brown front; the two oblong, white-framed windows,
the dark-green trellis porch between; the three windows above. And the
clipped privet bush by the trellis and the may tree by the gate.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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