Dolores drew a long shivering sigh. "Oh," she said, "I dread the sight
of land! It seems to me, I am going into some arid desert, where I shall
faint, and die, from very loneliness. I have lost my friend who was
almost like an own mother to me. And now I am to lose you. Life is cruel
to me. I think it is wicked for parents to bring children into this
world of trouble and sorrow. Oh, why was I ever born to swell the tide
of miserable suffering humanity?"
Percy laid his hand gently on her arm.
"You do not lose my friendship," he said. "Remember, I shall always be
your loyal friend, ready to do you any favor. But the close
companionship and intimate association of the last year becomes every
day more impossible. You must realize it yourself."
"I do, I do," she said, and then she put her hands over her face, and
her tears fell through the slender fingers.
"I wish I had been buried in the sea, too;" she sobbed. "I would not
have been so much alone as I am upon this dreary earth, where every
thing dear is taken from me."
He turned and took her hands down from her tear wet face, and drew them
closely in his own.
His face was very pale. His voice trembled with the intensity of his
emotions.
"Listen to me Dolores," he said, in a low, and almost stern tone. "I
think we understand and respect each other's views perfectly. I think,
if in a moment of profound sorrow like this, we disregarded the settled
convictions of a life-time, that we should in calmer and brighter hours
regret it. But I think also, that when two people have become so
necessary to each other's lives as we have become,--when such perfect
sympathy exists, as exists between us,--I think then, Dolores, that it
is wicked to throw aside the happiness which might be theirs. George
Eliot and Mr. Lewes did not throw it away; Shelley and Mary Godwin did
not; Mary Wollstonecraft and Imlay did not. It is simply a question
whether a woman cares more for the forms of Society, and the laws made
by men, than she cares for the love and companionship of one man. I have
found more happiness in this year of association with you, than I
supposed it possible for life to afford me. You are to me an ideal
comrade: I can picture years of such companionship; happy wanderings,
sweet home-comings, quiet evenings, cosy suppers, and all with the
perfect knowledge that it might cease at any time either or both wearied
of it; all with the knowledge that the individual liberty of each was
absolutely untrammeled; and that, when love ceased to exist--there were
no bonds to fetter. It seems to me that happiness, as perfect as it ever
exists in this world, might bless such an union of two lives. Dolores,
will you accept the love and protection I offer you?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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