“And yet,” I ventured to say, “there are folks who think that you young women should go to church more than you do.” “Oh, I do go to church. But I don’t take it seriously. I’m afraid I only glance at the bargains and go out at the other door.” “I dare say that you wouldn’t accept heaven unless there is an elevator, a writing-room and an orchestrion.” “Do you know, I fancy a good many of us think of the church as Mrs. Stellmore feels about her husband. Probably you don’t know Mrs. Stellmore. She is the second wife of one of our wealthiest brokers. The other night she walked up to him right before us all, and putting her hands on his shoulders said, ‘Oh, Tom! if you weren’t so good I couldn’t be so wicked.’” “I am going to ask as the foreigner who is writing us up so often asks: Is this typical? Are many of your husbands, so to speak, so good as Mr. Stellmore?” “I suppose you mean, good in the ways that will let us be wicked. I’m afraid a good many of them are. You see they are too busy to bother very much with us, and we are deep in all sorts of charitable and intellectual debaucheries. Then it is too late to try and reform us. But I was going to tell you about Mrs. Stellmore. She is very entertaining, and especially to her husband.” “Surely that is an admirable trait,” I said. “Oh, Stellmore knows what he is about when he lets her run around. She fetches him the most interesting stories. One afternoon I heard her say, ‘Well, I must go and chase up something to amuse Tom with.’” “It seems to me I have heard of that theory before, about the wife not staying home where there will be no news but the ill temper of the cook and the atrocities of the furnace, but going forth into the world, as she does, and bringing home something amusing or instructive.” “Maybe; but you never saw the scheme worked out so gayly as Mrs. Stellmore works it out. Of course she has a good time.” “Does she like his being so wonderfully willing?” “Now that is cynical. No, she doesn’t seem to mind it. She really likes her husband, and his goodness is a continual source of interest to her. She is very shrewd. When I had that dreadful psychological young woman to lecture at the house one afternoon I was telling Mrs. Stellmore what a fizzle the thing had been. ‘And yet,’ I said, ‘she had the most gorgeous recommendations.’ ‘My dear,’ said Mrs. Stellmore, ‘are you not aware that no women can get hold of such gorgeous recommendations as those who do not deserve them?’ Yet she is a thoroughly generous woman.” “Is she pretty?” “Not especially. She is a very decided blonde.” “The wicked dye young.” [Illustration] “But she is the real thing. That is the way with a good many of her other traits. She is more genuine than she gets credit for being. If it comes to that, society is very cynical. It is always suspecting a bleach.”