And then there came a long silence, a silence full of small sounds and
murmurs--the creak of a floorboard somewhere, the scutter of a beetle,
the distant--the very distant--shouting of late revellers. I was
certain--_certain_ that the man was Severn, and that what Terry had said
was all perfectly true; yet the certainty was outweighed in my mind by
the far more momentous revelation that Terry was ill, and that his
staring eyes and the hard drive of his breathing could only point in one
ominous direction. He was, as Mizzi had said, on the verge of a
breakdown. What he wanted was rest and sleep and freedom from work and
worry, and he wasn't getting any of it. What an irony that we had come
to Buda-Pesth for a holiday! ... He _must_ sleep anyway.... I took him
by the arm and said, as firmly and calmly as I could: "Look here, Terry,
there's nothing to be gained by arguing this out at one o'clock in the
morning. We don't actually know for certain that the man is Severn, and
even if we did we could do nothing. So go to bed and try to sleep, and
then in the morning maybe----"
But he shook himself free and walked across the room to the window.
"Moonlight," he muttered; pulling aside the paper blind. He stared hard
for a moment at the pavements below, and then, swinging round suddenly,
exclaimed: "You say that if we _did_ know for certain, we could do
nothing?"
"Nothing at all, I assure you, and that's why it's all the more
important that we shouldn't discuss it at this hour. So come now...."
Again I led him towards the door, and this time, without further
protest, he allowed me to pilot him along the corridor to the door of
his own room. He was muttering to himself, as I bade him good-night: "Do
nothing.... That's what you say ... just nothing ... nothing at all...."
XI
I oughtn't to have left him. I can see now that I oughtn't, but I had an
idea then that if he were left alone he would go to sleep. Not, of
course, immediately; I didn't do that myself. I lay awake, I think, for
two hours or more, smoking cigarette after cigarette and pondering. But
it wasn't Severn who occupied the centre of the stage. Perhaps it was
odd that his personal affairs stirred me so little; but then, I had
always felt that he was incalculable. There was hardly a thing in the
world, good or bad, that I would ever have swore that he wouldn't or
couldn't do. I don't mean to assert that I wasn't surprised to find him
running off with another woman; I _was_ surprised, but, if you know what
I mean, I wasn't surprised to be surprised.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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