Dystopias -- Fiction; Science fiction; United States -- Fiction
He had been prepared for Nedra to fly into her tigrish rage and come
dangerously toward him, compelling him once again to meet her in the
endless struggle of a mountain clansman with his mate--a struggle that
had begun to be exhilarating--she did not now so much as look at him.
She stood with her eyes averted, her shoulders drooped, her bosom
motionless, completely apathetic.
"Nedra?" he called. And she did not answer. She did not move. Her arms
were hanging slackly, the palms of her hands limp against her thighs.
O'Hara spun her around, looking into her eyes. If she saw him at all,
she perfectly concealed it. Her eyes were glazed, her lips seeming
loose. "Nedra," he cried, and shaking her, "Nedra, what is it? Do you
hear me, Nedra?"
"Yes," she said. "I hear you."
Above them again, at the hatch of the cylinder, the Son was saying,
"The Father waits for you. You must come now."
And for an instant, O'Hara heard in the Son's toneless voice an echo
of Nedra's--the same flatness, a mindless monotone. Now, in confused
panic, he was remembering the relative degrees of contamination he had
discovered earlier, low when above the mountains, extremely high both
toward the east and west of them and presumably even higher in these
atomic-powered cities--remembering too that the people of the mountains
had already taken that first stride back toward the dawn of man. And
had this sudden intensification of atomic pollution struck Nedra,
changing her, since daybreak, into another of these apelike people?
The thought of it revolted him. His reaction was violent.
Unforgivable, he called it--forever unforgivable, for in the next
moment he was guilty of that crime of crimes, unthinking passion, the
closest that man ever comes to bestiality--these words were his own,
the opinion that he voiced in Bloomsbury. He slashed his open hand
across her face.
The blow did not stagger her. When he could see again, she had not
moved--she was standing there before him, staring at him blankly, a
thin smear of blood coming from her mouth.
"Nothing I can say, nothing I've done since, can possibly atone for
that," said O'Hara. "For that was the ugly revulsion of a man who
strikes his misshapen son, loathing the tortured image of himself. All
men are capable of it, as I was capable of it. And even as it was done,
while the palm of my hand was aching from the blow I'd struck, the
abysmal shame of doing it was squeezing chilling fingers on my heart.
And something was changed, something was dead--passion perhaps was
dead. She was more to me than passion could possibly encompass after
that. A man must get down from the high horse of his masculinity to
know what I knew then, at last--I loved her. She was my bride at last.
My wife."
He stooped, placing one arm gently beneath her knees and then lifting
her unresisting body, and with his head bowed above her, he climbed the
steps that led out of the cylinder.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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