The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 09: Tangential ViewsBierce, Ambrose
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The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 09: Tangential Views
Bierce, Ambrose
American essays; American literature
The ultimate destiny of the American foot is a subject which, through
an enlightened selfishness, must more and more engage the interest
of the American head and the sympathies of the American heart. Even
apart from the question of its final fate and place in the scheme of
things, the human foot, American and foreign, has many features of
peculiar interest. In the singular complexity of its structure, closely
(and as the scientists affirm, significantly) resembling that of the
hand, lurk possibilities of controversy sufficient in themselves to
tempt attention and invite research. In truth this honorable member’s
framework may be said to consist mainly of bones of contention.
Religion affirms of its arched instep, its flexible toes, its padded
sole, and the other peculiarities of its intricate construction an
obvious adaptability of means to an end: proof positive of intelligent
design, and therefore of an intelligent Designer— _vide_
Whateley, _passim_. Science coldly replies by pointing to the
serviceable foot of the bear, which lacks the arched instep, and of the
horse, which is without the flexible toes, or toes of any kind, and
in which no use is made of the padded sole. To the simple purposes to
which the human foot is applied, says the scientist, its complexity is
in no sense nor degree contributory; it would perform all its offices
equally well if it were a hoof. All the distinguishing features of
the human foot, as contrasted with that, for example, of the horse or
sheep, he avers to be such, variously modified by long and regrettable
disuse, as fit animals for climbing trees and dwelling in the branches.
The human foot is, in short, according to this view of the matter,
nothing but an expurgated edition of that of the monkey, and a standing
evidence of our descent from that tree-dwelling philosopher.
Into this controversy I do not purpose to enter; I prefer to stand afar
off and suggest a compromise, whereby each contentionary may retain,
with the other’s assent, all that essential part of his belief which is
precious to his mind and heart. Let the scientist surrender so much of
his theory as is incompatible with the assumption of creative design,
the religionist so much of his faith as traverses the assertion of
arboreal activity. The new theory, taking broad enough ground for all
to stand upon, may be formulated somewhat as follows: The human foot as
we have it was designed by an intelligent Power in order to fit mankind
for an arboreal future.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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