"On the double crown on your head," Jack answered, solemnly, "which you have often told us was considered a sign that an angel had touched you--I'm sure nothing could be more solemn than that. It isn't every fellow that can get an angel to touch the top of his head." "No; most fellows can consider themselves lucky if an angel touches their lips--or heart," Barney cried, naïvely. "Well, never mind that sort of angel now, Barney," Nick said, pettishly; "I notice that you always bring up with something about the girls, no matter what the subject we set off on. It's the jalap--isn't that what it's called?--we want to hear about." "There isn't enough poetry or sentiment in the two o' ye to fill a wind-blown buttercup. No wonder ye don't care to talk of the gurls--they'll have none of ye." "We'll be satisfied if they'll have you, Barney. I'm sure that's magnanimous. But if your jalap takes as much time in working Old Schnapps as you take in explaining it, the war will be over, and we shall have seen none of it." "It's too great a conception to be hastily set forth. Give me time. I'll lay a guinea that Oswald goes to the hospital before this day week. Let us see. This is the 14th; before the 20th--" and Barney gave the barrel of his gun, near him, a furtive wipe with his coat-sleeve. "Barney, if you'll do that, I'll gather every four-leaved clover between here and Richmond to give you; and, what's more, if I die I'll leave you my bones to operate." "Ah, Nick, dear, I'd rather have your little finger living than all the possessions of your father's bank. If you were dead--" And honest Barney seized the poet's hand sentimentally. "Come, come, fellows, what sort of soldiering do you call this? You remind me of two school-girls," Jack remonstrated, as in duty bound to keep up the warrior spirit. "Yer acquaintances among females being chiefly of the silly sort, it's no wonder we remind you of the only things you can look back on without blushing," Barney retorted; and a neighbor poking his head in the door to learn the cause of the hilarity, the conspirators sallied out for a jaunt until parade-time. Now, what means Barney employed, or whether he had any handiwork in what befell, it does not fall to me to say, but this is what happened: A market hawker came into camp the next morning and went straight to the big marquee tent where Colonel Oswald stood, in all the bravery of a new broadcloth uniform with spreading eagles on the shoulders. The savory fumes of hot sauerkraut aroused the warrior from his reveries, and he asked, in vociferous delight: _"Was haben sie? Kohlen, nicht wahr--sauerkraut--das is aber schon?"_ "Yes, mein golonel, I hof cabbage und sauerkraut und"--looking about circumspectly--"_etwas schnapps aus Antwerpen gebracht?"_