"One night I fled that hard indifferent eye; To crowds, the heart that Home rejects, will fly!-- Gay glides the dance, soft music fills the hall: I fled, to find, the loneliness through all! Thou know'st but half a brother's bond I claim,-- My mother's daughter bears her father's name; My mother's heart had long denied her son, And loath'd the tie that pride had taught to shun. My sister's lips, forbid the bond to own, Left the scorn'd life, a brother breathed, unknown.[R] Not even yet the alien blood confest; Who, in the swart hues of the Eastern guest And unfamiliar name, could kindred trace With the young Beauty of the Northern Race?-- Calm in the crowd I stood, when hark, a word Smote on my ear, and stunn'd the soul that heard! A sound, with withering laughter muttered o'er, Blistering the name--O God!--a sister bore; Nought clear, and nought defined, save scorn alone,-- Not heard the name scorn coupled with her own; Somewhat of nuptials fix'd, of broken ties, The foul cause hinted in the vile surmise, The gallant's fame for conquests, lightly won, For homes dishonour'd, and for hearts undone: Not one alone on whom my wrath could seize, From lip to lip the dizzying slander flees; No single ribald separate from the herd, Through the blent hum one stinging tumult stirr'd; One felt, unseen, infection circling there A bodiless venom in the common air, And as the air impalpable!--so seem The undistinguished terrors of a dream, Now clear, now dim, transform'd from shape to shape, The gibbering spectres scare us and escape. "Fearful the commune, in that dismal night, Between the souls which could no more unite,-- The lawful anger and the shaming fears, Man's iron question, woman's burning tears; All that, once utter'd, rend for aye the ties Of the close bond God fashion'd in the skies. I learn'd at last,--for 'midst my wrath, deep trust In what I loved, left even passion just; And I believed the word, the lip, the eye, That to my horrid question flash'd reply;-- I learn'd at last that but the name was stain'd, Honour was wreck'd, but Purity remain'd. Oh pardon, pardon!--if a doubt that sears, A word that stains, profane such holy ears! So, oft amidst my loneliness, my heart Hath communed with itself, and groan'd apart,-- Recall'd that night, and in its fierce despair, Shaped some full vengeance from the desert air,-- That I forgot what angel, new from Heaven, Sweet spotless listener, to my side was given! "But who the recreant lover?--this, in vain My question sought; that truth not hard to gain; And my brow darken'd as I breathed the threat Fierce in her shrinking ear, 'that wrath should reach him yet!' I left her speechless; when the morning came, } With the fierce pang, writhed the self-tortured frame, } The poison hid by Woe, drain'd by despairing Shame. }