The Satyricon of Petronius ArbiterPetronius Arbiter
General
The Satyricon of Petronius Arbiter
Petronius Arbiter
Rome -- Fiction; Satire, Latin -- Translations into English
"for till she has gotten her plate together, and distributed what we
leave among the servants, not a sip of any thing goes into her mouth."
"But unless she sits down," replied Habinas, "I'll be gone"; and was
getting up, but that the word being four times given about for her,
she came at last in a greenish gown and a cherry-colour'd stomacher,
beneath which might be seen her petticoat and embroidered garters;
then wiping her hands on her neckcloth, she sate on that bed whereon
Scintilla the wife of Habinas was; and having given her a kiss, told
her it was in compliment to her that she was there. At length it came
to this, that she took off her weighty bracelets, and shewed them to
Scintilla, which she admiring, she also unbuckled her garters and a
net-work purse, which she said was of the finest gold.
Trimalchio observed it, and commanding all to be laid before him,
"See," said he, "this womans finery, and what fools our wives make us;
they should be six pound and a half; yet I've another of Mercury's
making, that weighs ten": And that he might not be thought to tell a
lye, called for his gold scales, and commanded them to be weighed: Nor
had Scintilla more wit than t'other, for pulling a golden box out of
her bosom, which she called good luck, she took out of it two large
pearl pendants, giving them in like manner to Fortunata to view:
"See," quoth she, "what 'tis to have a kind husband, I am sure no
woman has better." "What," said Habinas, "hast thou put the sham on
me? thou toldst me thou couldst be contented with glass beads; and for
this trick, if I had a daughter I'd cut off her ears; tho' were there
no women what were the rest worth? This is to piss warm and drink
cold."
Mean time the women perceiving they were toucht, twitter'd among
themselves, and being got drunk, fell to kissing one another; one
commended the mistress of the house, t'other the master: when during
this chatter, Habinas stealing behind Fortunata, gave her such a toss
on the bed, that her heels flew as high as her head, on which she gave
a squeak or two, and finding her thighs bare, ran her head under
Scintilla's smock.
This held a while, till Trimalchio calling for a second service to
entertain his new guests, the servants took away the tables that were
before us, and having brought others, strew'd the room with pin-dust,
mixt with vermillion and saffron; and what I never saw before, the
dust of a looking-glass ground to powder.
When immediately, quoth Trimalchio, "I could have been contented with
those first dishes; but since we have got other tables, we must also
have another service; and if there be any thing worth our having,
bring it."
On which, a spruce boy that served us with warm water, began to
imitate a nightingale; till Trimalchio giving the word, a servant that
waited on Habinas, set up another humour, and, as I believe, commanded
by his master, nois'd out;
"Mean time Æneas had put off to sea."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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