Christian life -- Fiction; Conduct of life -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Ellen had no particular reason to think _she_ was meant, and yet
she did think so. She remained quite still, but with raised
colour and quickened breathing waited to hear what would come
next. Nothing came at first, and she was beginning to think
she had perhaps been mistaken, when she plainly heard Margaret
Dunscombe say, in a loud whisper
"Mamma, I wish you could contrive some way to keep her in the
cabin can't you? she looks so odd in that queer sun-bonnet
kind of a thing, that anybody would think she had come out of
the woods; and no gloves too; I shouldn't like to have the
Miss M'Arthurs think she belonged to us; can't you, Mamma?"
If a thunderbolt had fallen at Ellen's feet, the shock would
hardly have been greater. The lightning of passion shot
through every vein. And it was not passion only: there was
hurt feeling and wounded pride; and the sorrow of which her
heart was full enough before, now wakened afresh. The child
was beside herself. One wild wish for a hiding-place was the
most pressing thought to be where tears could burst and her
heart could break unseen. She slid off her bench and rushed
through the crowd to the red curtain that cut off the far end
of the saloon; and from there down to the cabin below people
were everywhere. At last she spied a nook where she could be
completely hidden. It was in the far-back end of the boat,
just under the stairs by which she had come down. Nobody was
sitting on the three or four large mahogany steps that ran
round that end of the cabin, and sloped up to the little cabin
window: and creeping beneath the stairs, and seating herself
on the lowest of these steps, the poor child found that she
was quite screened, and out of sight of every human creature.
It was time, indeed; her heart had been almost bursting with
passion and pain, and now the pent-up tempest broke forth with
a fury that racked her little frame from head to foot; and the
more because she strove to stifle every sound of it as much as
possible. It was the very bitterness of sorrow, without any
softening thought to allay it, and sharpened and made more
bitter by mortification and a passionate sense of unkindness
and wrong. And through it all, how constantly in her heart the
poor child was reaching forth longing arms towards her far-off
mother, and calling in secret on her beloved name. "Oh, Mamma!
Mamma!" was repeated numberless times, with the unspeakable
bitterness of knowing that she would have been a sure refuge
and protection from all this trouble, but was now where she
could neither reach nor hear her. Alas! how soon and how sadly
missed!
Ellen's distress was not soon quieted, or, if quieted for a
moment, it was only to break out afresh. And then she was glad
to sit still and rest herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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