*I have taken the first opportunity to write, in hopes of profiting by your answer. I want to know the most effectual way to grow in grace; how to improve by all things; how to make good use of the dulness which often creeps upon my mind, and makes my soul stupidly inactive. I want to be all attention to God; to have every faculty of my mind fixedly waiting upon him: but I find myself beat off of this by weariness or listlessness. I often seem to stand fast in the Lord, and am steddily looking unto him; but (I suppose, through unwatchfulness) often lose the deep consciousness, that, “God is here:” yet he does not condemn me; but I abhor myself, while I see the Saviour graciously near. My heart crieth without a voice, “Come and mould thy passive clay. Keep my attention rightly exercised every moment.” And while I call, my Jesus answers. O, did I pray without fainting, I should then be what I wish. I praise the lover of your soul, that he delights to bless you. May you ever see his full sufficiency to save, and live in the fountain-head of bliss! * * * * * _January 26, 1762._ BLESSED be God, I only seek his approbation, and am content with that alone. The night you wrote, the Lord spake to my heart, “All is your’s.” I feel it true, for Christ is mine. Indeed he is precious to me. My soul is satisfied with its portion. Yet “eager I ask and pant for more.” But my wants do not discourage me. I delight to feel them, for I am persuaded out of his fulness I shall receive a supply. Even while I am receiving from him, he makes me capable of more. I am amazed at his grace. “I cannot praise him as I wou’d, But he is merciful and good,” and does not despise the day of small things. I know I have been unfaithful to the grace of God; yet ♦he pardons without upbraiding. O that every future moment may prove, I feel the time past sufficeth! When I consider you as a younger scholar, I am ashamed; yet I rejoice the Master loveth us both. And though he may justly say to me, “O, slow of heart to understand,” yet he teaches me, as I am able to receive, the lesson of his love. I often meet your spirit, when I go in secret before our Lord. He only knows, how much I desire you may increase, with all the increase of God. May you follow the Lamb in all things! I praise him, that he unites me to himself, and to all whose fellowship is with him: I thank him who gives us to drink into one spirit. My heart feels God continually nigh. My only wish is his will; my only desire his glory. ♦ “ye” replaced with “he” * * * * * _Good Friday._