The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original IllustrationsHood, Thomas
General
The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original Illustrations
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
it under--there’s nothing worse than being taken by surprise. Read
this letter frequently, and impress these charges on your mind. It
is a sad change for England to have become, I may say, this fiery
furnace. I have not the least doubt, if properly traced, the burning
cliff at Weymouth would be found to be connected with Incendiarism, and
the Earthquakes at Chichester with our political convulsions. Thank
Providence in your prayers, Davis, that your own station forbids your
being an M.P., for a place in parliament is little better than sitting
on a barrel of gunpowder. Honour forbids to resign, or I should wish I
was nothing but a simple country gentleman. Remember, and be vigilant.
Once more I cry Watch, Watch, Watch! By adopting the motions I propose,
a conflagration may be adjourned sine die, which is a petition
perpetually presented by
Your anxious but uncompromising Master,
JACOB JUBB, M.P.
_To Lady Jubb, at 45, Portland Place._
RESPECTED MADAM,
I received your Ladyship’s obliging commands, and have used my best
endeavours to conform to the wishes condescended therein. In respect
to political controversy, I beg to say I have imposed a tacit silence
on the domestic capacities as far as within the sphere of my control,
but lament to say the Bailiff, Mr. Davis, is a party unamenable to
my authority, and as such has taken liberties with decorum quite
unconsistent with propriety and the decency due. However reluctant
to censoriousness, duty compels to communicate subversive conduct
quite unconformable to decency’s rules and order in a well-regulated
establishment. I allude to Mr. Davis’s terrifically jumping out from
behind doors and in obscure dark corners, on the female domestics, for
no reasonable purpose I can discover, except to make them exert their
voices in a very alarming manner. The housemaid, indeed, confirms me
by saying in her own words, “he considered her skreek the best skreek
in the family.” If impropriety had proceeded no further, I should have
hesitated to trouble your Ladyship with particulars; but Mr. Davis,
not satisfied with thus working on the unsophisticated terrors of
ignorant females, thought proper to horrify with inflammatory reports.
[Illustration: A MARKED MAN.]
[Illustration: WAPPING OLD STARES.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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