They Call Me Carpenter: A Tale of the Second Coming — John Shaqi
They Call Me Carpenter: A Tale of the Second ComingSinclair, Upton
General
They Call Me Carpenter: A Tale of the Second Coming
Sinclair, Upton
Hollywood (Los Angeles, Calif.) -- Fiction; Jesus Christ -- Fiction
The place was an empty warehouse, fitted with long tables, and
benches made of planks that were old and full of splinters. Here in
rows of twenty or thirty were seated men and women and children,
mixed together; before each one a bowl of not very thick soup, and a
hunk of bread, and a tin cup full of hot brown liquid, politely
taken for coffee. It was a meal which would have been spurned by any
of the “studio bums” of T-S's mob-scenes; but now T-S was going to
be a good sport, and sit on a splintery plank and eat it!
Nor was that all. As we pushed our way into the place, Carpenter
turned to the magnate, and without a trace of embarrassment, said:
“You understand, Mr. T-S, I have no money. But we must pay--”
“Oh, sure!” said T-S, quickly. “I'll pay!”
“Thank you,” said the other; and he turned to an official of the
union with whom he had got acquainted in the course of the morning.
He introduced us all, not forgetting the secretary, and then said:
“Mr. T-S is the moving picture producer, and wants to have lunch
with you, if you will consent.”
“Oh, sure!” said the official, cordially.
“He will pay for it,” added Carpenter. “He has brought along a
thousand dollars for that purpose.”
T-S started as if some one had struck him; and the official started
too. “WHAT?”
“He will pay a thousand dollars,” declared Carpenter. “It is a fact,
and you may tell the people, if you wish.”
“My Gawd, no!” cried T-S wildly.
But the official did not heed him. He faced the crowd and stretched
out his arms. “Boys! Boys! This is Mr. T-S, the picture producer,
and he's come to lunch with us, and he's going to pay a thousand
dollars for it!”
There was a moment of amazed silence, then a roar from the company.
Men leaped to their feet and yelled. And there stood poor T-S-not
enjoying the ovation!
“Give it to them,” whispered Carpenter; and the magnate, thus held
up, took out the roll of bills, and turned it over to the trembling
official, who leaped onto a chair and waved the miracle before the
crowd. “A thousand dollars! A thousand dollars!” He counted it over
before their eyes and called, louder than ever, “A thousand
dollars!”
Carpenter, followed by T-S and the secretary and myself, went down
the line of tables, shaking hands with many on the way, and being
patted on the back by others. Also T-S shook hands, and was patted.
Seats were found for us, and food was brought--double portions of
it, as if to make the plight of the poor magnate even more absurd! I
watched him out of the corner of my eye; he enjoyed that costly meal
just about as much as Carpenter had enjoyed the one at Prince's last
night!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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