Christian fiction; Wingfold, Thomas (Fictitious character) -- Fiction
“I repeat,” said Polwarth, “that the community whose servant you are was
not founded to promulgate or defend the doctrine of the existence of a
Deity, but to perpetuate the assertion of a man that he was the son
and only revealer of the Father of men, a fact, if it be a fact, which
precludes the question of the existence of a God, because it includes
the answer to it. Your business, therefore, even as one who finds
himself in your unfortunate position as a clergyman, is to make yourself
acquainted with that man: he will be to you nobody save in revealing,
through knowledge of his inmost heart, the Father to you. Take then your
New Testament as if you had never seen it before, and read--to find out.
If in him you fail to meet God, then go to your consciousness of the
race, your metaphysics, your Plato, your Spinosa. Till then, this point
remains: there was a man who said he knew him, and that if you would
give heed to him, you too should know him. The record left of him is
indeed scanty, yet enough to disclose what manner of man he was--his
principles, his ways of looking at things, his thoughts of his Father
and his brethren and the relations between them, of man’s business in
life, his destiny, and his hopes.”
“I see plainly,” answered the curate, “that what you say, I must do.
But how, while on duty as a clergyman, I DO NOT KNOW. How am I, with the
sense of the unreality of my position ever growing upon me, and my utter
inability to supply the wants of the congregation, save from my uncle’s
store of dry provender, which it takes me a great part of my time so to
modify as, in using it, to avoid direct lying--with all this pressing
upon me, and making me restless and irritable and self-contemptuous,
how AM I to set myself to such solemn work, wherein a man must surely be
clear-eyed and single-hearted, if he would succeed in his quest?--I must
resign my curacy.”
Mr. Polwarth thought a little.
“It would be well, I think, to retain it for a time at least while you
search,” he said. “If you do not within a month see prospect of finding
him, then resign. In any case, your continuance in the service must
depend on your knowledge of the lord of it, and his will concerning
you.”
“May not a prejudice in favour of my profession blind and deceive me?”
“I think it will rather make YOU doubtful of conclusions that support
it.”
“I will go and try,” said Wingfold, rising; “but I fear I am not the man
to make discoveries in such high regions.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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