I had been there once or twice before, because the governor took an
interest in me, and had tried to get me to talk. I would never do that,
and I fear that he had thought that I was sullen or morose. He had asked
me about my life before I had come to prison; had tried even to consult
my wishes as to what work I should do; he had been uniformly kind and
considerate. Now, as I went along to his room, I wondered petulantly
what new thing this was that he wished to say to me. I did not like the
room; it was a dreadful place to me, hung about with brightly polished
steel chains and fetters, and with only a little table in the middle, at
which he sat while any poor prisoner talked to him. I was left alone
with him there, and he looked at me for a moment or two in silence. He
had been a soldier, I think; he was a fine-looking old fellow, with a
trim moustache and deep-set grey eyes.
"I have some news for you," he said in his abrupt fashion, "and I want
you to prepare yourself for it. You are not strong, and I do not want to
give you a shock of any sort."
I thanked him, and wondered dully what he meant.
"If you could have at the present moment anything for which you liked to
ask, what would you choose?" he asked me.
I shook my head stupidly, and said that I did not know; corrected myself
in a moment, and asked, wistfully enough and almost with tears in my
eyes, that I might have the making of some particular sort of pan in the
tinsmith's shop; I had fancied it greatly, but they had given it to
another man. He seemed touched by that, and laughed and shook his head;
I had never heard him laugh before.
"An order has come to me from the Home Office in regard to you," he
said. "Can you guess what it is?"--I shook my head; I did not understand
that anything could happen to me.--"An order for your release."
I did not understand, and I suppose I stood staring at him as stupidly
as before. For I had been condemned for life; what could this mean now?
More than that, I had become settled in the place, and the idea that I
should never leave it had sunk gradually into my mind, and had nailed
me, as it were, to that spot, so that it would be difficult to tear me
from it. I murmured that I did not understand.
"I have sent reports concerning you again and again to the Home Office,"
went on the governor; "I have been able to point out that you have been
an exemplary prisoner; I have urged that fact upon them again and again.
Do you know, Avaline, how long you've been here?"
I shook my head; I think I sighed a little. "I think I've forgotten,
sir," I said. "So many winters--so many times when the sun shone, and I
knew the summer had come again--but I have lost count of the years."
"You were here before my time," he said; and then added in what seemed
to be a hushed voice: "You have been here for twenty years."
I said again that I had not kept count; I think I added a little wearily
that it did not matter. His kindly voice went on--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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