Such an agent was soon found,--a man admirably adapted in many respects
for the station. He had been an adventurer all his life; served with the
French in Austria, and the Austrians in the Banat; held an independent
command of Turks during the Crimean War; besides, episodically, having
“done a little,” as he called it, on the Indian frontier with the
Yankees; and served on the staff of Rosas, at La Plata; all his great
and varied experiences tending to one solitary conviction, that no real
success was ever to be attained in anything except by means of Irishmen;
nor could order, peace, and loyalty be ever established anywhere without
their assistance. If he was one of the bravest men living, he was one
of the most pushing and impertinent. He would have maintained a point of
law against the Lord Chancellor, and contested tactics with a Marshal of
France. He thought himself the ornament of any society he entered, and
his vanity, in matters of intellect, was only surpassed by his personal
conceit. And now one word as to his appearance. With the aid of cleverly
constructed boots he stood five feet four, but was squarely, stoutly
built, broad in the chest, and very bow-legged; his head was large, and
seemed larger from a mass of fiery red hair, of which he was immensely
vain as the true Celtic color; he wore great whiskers, a moustache, and
chin-tuft; but the flaming hue of these seemed actually tamed and toned
down beside his eyes, which resembled two flaring carbuncles. They were
the most excitable, quarrelsome, restless pair of orbs that ever beamed
in a human head. They twinkled and sparkled with an incessant mischief,
and they darted such insolent glances right and left as seemed to say,
“Is there any one present who will presume to contradict me?”
His boundless self-conceit would have been droll if it had not been so
offensive. His theory was this: all men detested him; all women adored
him. Europe had done little better than intrigue for the last quarter
of a century what country could secure his services. As for the insolent
things he had said to kings and emperors, and the soft speeches that
empresses and queens had made to himself, they would fill a volume.
Believe him, and he had been on terms of more than intimacy in every
royal palace of the Continent. Show the slightest semblance of doubt in
him, and the chances were that he 'd have had you “out” in the morning.
Amongst his self-delusions, it was one to believe that his voice and
accent were peculiarly insinuating. There was, it is true, a certain
slippery insincerity about them, but the vulgarity was the chief
characteristic; and his brogue was that of Leinster, which, even to
Irish ears, is insufferable.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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