So they _all_ say. The answer is almost part of the liturgy. But have a care, my dear fellow! The true eugenist eschews the wine cup. In every hundred children of a man who ingests one fluid ounce of alcohol a day, six will be left-handed, twelve will be epileptics and nineteen will suffer from adolescent albuminuria, with delusions of persecution.... Have you ever had anthrax? THE BRIDEGROOM Not yet. THE CLERGYMAN Eczema? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Pott's disease? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Cholelithiasis? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Do you have a feeling of distention after meals? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Have you a dry, hacking cough? THE BRIDEGROOM Not at present. THE CLERGYMAN Are you troubled with insomnia? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Dyspepsia? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Agoraphobia? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Do you bolt your food? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Have you lightning pains in the legs? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Are you a bleeder? Have you haemophilia? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN Erthrocythaemia? Nephroptosis? Fibrinous bronchitis? Salpingitis? Pylephlebitis? Answer yes or no. THE BRIDEGROOM No. No. No. No. No. THE CLERGYMAN Have you ever been refused life insurance? If so, when, by what company or companies, and why? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN What is a staphylococcus? THE BRIDEGROOM No. THE CLERGYMAN (_Sternly_) What? THE BRIDEGROOM (_Nervously_) Yes. THE CLERGYMAN (_Coming to the rescue_) Wilt them have this woman et cetera? Answer yes or no. THE BRIDEGROOM I will. THE CLERGYMAN (_Turning to_ THE BRIDE) Mary, wilt thou have this gentleman to be thy wedded husband, to live together in the holy state of aseptic matrimony? Wilt thou love him, serve him, protect him from all adulterated victuals, and keep him hygienically clothed; and forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live? If so---- THE BRIDE (_Instantly and loudly_) I will. THE CLERGYMAN Not so fast! First, there is the little ceremony of the clinical thermometers. (_He takes up one of the thermometers._) Open your mouth, my dear. (_He Inserts the thermometer._) Now hold it there while you count one hundred and fifty. And you, too. (_To_ THE BRIDEGROOM.) I had almost forgotten you. (THE BRIDEGROOM _opens his mouth and the other thermometer is duly planted. While the two are counting_, THE CLERGYMAN _attempts to turn back one of_ THE BRIDE'S _eyelids, apparently searching for trachoma, but his rubber gloves impede the operation and so he gives it up. It is now time to read the thermometers._ THE BRIDEGROOM'S _is first removed._) THE CLERGYMAN