Parents and teachers fail because they cannot see the world as the
child sees it. The child of three is a frank egoist. He cares for no
one but himself, and the world is his. Anger him and he would have you
drawn and quartered if he had the power. His instincts prompt him to
master his environment, and to begin with, when he is a few weeks old,
his environment and his own person are indistinguishable.
Homer Lane gives a delightful description of the child's first efforts
and how they are frustrated by ignorant adults.
"At a very early age the child becomes aware through various processes
that his own hand which he has seen moving across his line of vision is
a part of himself, and that he can move it himself. He has discovered
power. He then enters upon his career. The same motive that will
govern his behaviour for the rest of his life comes into operation, and
he wants to use this new-found power for some purpose that will
increase his enjoyment of life. Up to this time he has had only one
pleasure, and that was to do with the commissariat. Having discovered
power over his fist he therefore wants to put it in his mouth . . . a
difficult task requiring much practice and patient perseverance.
"As he goes on working he learns that his power increases with effort,
and now his motive is modified. At first it was purely materialistic;
he wanted to have his fist in his mouth. Now he wants to put it there.
His interest is in doing the thing rather than in having it.
"This is the spiritual element in his present desire, and now comes the
first mistake in education. The mother, analysing the behaviour of the
child, has noticed his complaint at the difficulty of the task as
fatigue sets in, and, misunderstanding the motive of the child she
helps him to put his fist in his mouth. But that is just what the
child did not want, and he protests violently against this interference
with his purpose in life.
"The mother again makes a false analysis of the situation, and
concludes that his protest is the result of his disappointment that
there is no nourishment in the fist. She then gives him food or
paregoric, whatever may be her method of dealing with the spiritual
unrest of her child, and thus drugs his creative faculties."
I have said that the infant is an egoist. If his egoism is allowed
full scope he will enter upon the next stage of life, the
self-assertive stage, with a huge capacity for being altruistic. This
stage comes on about the age of six or seven. But if the child has had
parents who believe in moulding character he will have had many severe
lectures about his selfishness. These lectures will not have cured his
selfishness; they will have driven it underground for the moment. The
selfishness of adults is one result of the moral lecture in childhood,
for no wish or emotion will remain buried for ever.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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