A Duet, with an Occasional ChorusDoyle, Arthur Conan
General
A Duet, with an Occasional Chorus
Doyle, Arthur Conan
Married people -- Fiction
‘You make me feel such a brute,’ said he. ‘Anyhow, I love you now with
all my heart and mind and soul.’
‘Forty-firstly and lastly,’ she sobbed, half laughing and half crying.
Then she pulled his hair to reassure him.
‘I can’t be angry with you,’ said she. ‘Besides, it would be ungenerous
to be angry when you tell me things of your own free will. You are not
forced to tell me. It is very honourable of you. But I do wish you had
taken an interest in me first.’
‘Well, it was not so fated. I suppose there are some men who are quite
good when they are bachelors. But I don’t believe they are the best men.
They are either archangels upon earth—young Gladstones and Newmans—or
else they are cold, calculating, timid, un-virile creatures, who will
never do any good. The first class must be splendid. I never met one
except in memoirs. The others I don’t want to meet.’
Women are not interested in generalities.
‘Were they nicer than me?’ she asked.
‘Who?’
‘Those forty women.’
‘No, dear, of course not. Why are you laughing?’
‘Well, it came into my head how funny it would be, if the forty were all
gathered into one room, and you were turned loose in the middle of them.’
‘Funny!’ Frank ejaculated. Women have such extraordinary ideas of
humour. Maude laughed until she was quite tired.
‘It doesn’t strike you as comic?’ she cried at last.
‘No, it doesn’t,’ he answered coldly.
‘Of course it wouldn’t,’ said she, and went off into another ripple of
pretty contralto laughter. There is a soft, deep, rich laugh, which some
women have, that is the sweetest sound in Nature.
‘When you have quite finished,’ said he huffily. Her jealousy was much
more complimentary than her ridicule.
‘All right now. Don’t be cross. If I didn’t laugh I should cry. I’m so
sorry if I have annoyed you.’ He had gone back to his chair, so she paid
him a flying visit. ‘Satisfied?’
‘Not quite.’
‘Now?’
‘All right. I forgive you.’
‘That’s funny too. Fancy _you_ forgiving _me_ after all these
confessions. But you never loved one of them all as you love me.’
‘Never.’
‘Swear it.’
‘I do swear it.’
‘Morally, and what do you call it, and the other?’
‘Not one of them.’
‘And never will again?’
‘Never.’
‘Good boy for ever and ever?’
‘For ever and ever.’
‘And the forty were horrid?’
‘No, hang it, Maude, I can’t say that.’
She pouted and hung her head.
‘You do like them better, then?’
‘How absurd you are, Maude! If I had liked one better, I should have
married her.’
‘Well, yes, I suppose you would. You must have taken a deeper interest
in me than in the others, since you married me. I hadn’t thought of
that.’
‘Silly old girl! Of course I liked you best. Let us drop the thing, and
never talk about it any more.’
‘Have you their photographs?’
‘No.’
‘None of them?’
‘No.’
‘What did you do with them?’
‘I never had most of them.’
‘And the others?’
‘I destroyed some when I married.’
‘That was nice of you. Aren’t you sorry?’
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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