A Portrait of the Artist as a Young ManJoyce, James
General
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
Joyce, James
Artists -- Fiction; Autobiographical fiction; Bildungsromans; Dublin (Ireland) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
It was towards the close of his first term in the college when he was
in number six. His sensitive nature was still smarting under the lashes
of an undivined and squalid way of life. His soul was still disquieted
and cast down by the dull phenomenon of Dublin. He had emerged from a
two years’ spell of reverie to find himself in the midst of a new
scene, every event and figure of which affected him intimately,
disheartened him or allured and, whether alluring or disheartening,
filled him always with unrest and bitter thoughts. All the leisure
which his school life left him was passed in the company of subversive
writers whose gibes and violence of speech set up a ferment in his
brain before they passed out of it into his crude writings.
The essay was for him the chief labour of his week and every Tuesday,
as he marched from home to the school, he read his fate in the
incidents of the way, pitting himself against some figure ahead of him
and quickening his pace to outstrip it before a certain goal was
reached or planting his steps scrupulously in the spaces of the
patchwork of the pathway and telling himself that he would be first and
not first in the weekly essay.
On a certain Tuesday the course of his triumphs was rudely broken. Mr
Tate, the English master, pointed his finger at him and said bluntly:
—This fellow has heresy in his essay.
A hush fell on the class. Mr Tate did not break it but dug with his
hand between his thighs while his heavily starched linen creaked about
his neck and wrists. Stephen did not look up. It was a raw spring
morning and his eyes were still smarting and weak. He was conscious of
failure and of detection, of the squalor of his own mind and home, and
felt against his neck the raw edge of his turned and jagged collar.
A short loud laugh from Mr Tate set the class more at ease.
—Perhaps you didn’t know that, he said.
—Where? asked Stephen.
Mr Tate withdrew his delving hand and spread out the essay.
—Here. It’s about the Creator and the soul. Rrm... rrm... rrm... Ah!
_without a possibility of ever approaching nearer._ That’s heresy.
Stephen murmured:
—I meant _without a possibility of ever reaching_.
It was a submission and Mr Tate, appeased, folded up the essay and
passed it across to him, saying:
—O... Ah! _ever reaching._ That’s another story.
But the class was not so soon appeased. Though nobody spoke to him of
the affair after class he could feel about him a vague general
malignant joy.
A few nights after this public chiding he was walking with a letter
along the Drumcondra Road when he heard a voice cry:
—Halt!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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