That must have been it, I think. For, greedy as he was over
his money, he was greedier still over his wife. I turned him over on
his back, and left him lying there, and I went home to the mill and
began my day's work, till the people came and wakened her and told the
tale; then I left off work and came and looked on like the rest of
them. That is all.'
The man who made the confession was calm and unmoved; the priest who
heard it was sick with horror, pale to the lips with agitation and
anguish.
'But his wife is accused! She may be condemned!' he cried, in agony.
'I know that,' said the man, stolidly. 'But you cannot tell of me. I
have told you under the seal of confession.'
It was quite true; come what would, Don Gesualdo could never reveal
what he had heard. His eyes swam, his head reeled, a deadly sickness
came upon him; all his short life simple and harmless things had been
around him; he had been told of the crimes of men, but he had never
been touched by them; he had known of the sins of the world, but he had
never realised them. The sense that the murderer of Tasso Tassilo was
within a hand's breadth of him, that these eyes which stared at him,
this voice which spoke to him, were those of the actual assassin, that
it was possible, and yet utterly impossible, for him to help justice
and save innocence--all this overcame him with its overwhelming burden
of horror and of divided duty. He lost all consciousness as he knelt
there and fell heavily forward on the wood-work of the confessional.
His teachers had said aright in the days of his novitiate, that he
would never be of stern enough stuff to deal with the realities of life.
When he recovered his senses, sight and sound and sensibility all
returning to him slowly and with a strange, numb pricking pain in his
limbs, and his body and his brain, the church was quite dark, and the
man who had confessed his crime to him was gone.
Gesualdo gathered himself up with effort, and sat down on the wooden
seat and tried to think. He was bitterly ashamed of his own weakness.
What was he worth, he, shepherd and leader of men, if at the first word
of horror which affrighted him, he fainted as women faint, and failed
to speak in answer the condemnation which should have been spoken? Was
it for such cowardice as this that they had anointed him and received
him as a servitor of the Church?
His first impulse was to go and relate his feebleness and failure
to his bishop; the next he remembered that even so much support as
this he must not seek; to no living being must he tell this wretched
blood-secret.
The law which respects nothing would not respect the secrets of the
confessional; but he knew that all the human law in the world could not
alter his own bondage to the duty he had with his own will accepted.
It was past midnight when, with trembling limbs, he groped his way out
of the porch of his church and found the entrance of the presbytery,
and climbed the stone stairs to his own chamber.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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