The whole question dwells for me in a single small reminiscence, though
there are others still: that of my having been sent to bed one evening,
in Fourteenth Street, as a very small boy, at an hour when, in the
library and under the lamp, one of the elder cousins from Albany, the
youngest of an orphaned brood of four, of my grandmother's most
extravagant adoption, had begun to read aloud to my mother the new,
which must have been the first, instalment of David Copperfield. I had
feigned to withdraw, but had only retreated to cover close at hand, the
friendly shade of some screen or drooping table-cloth, folded up behind
which and glued to the carpet, I held my breath and listened. I listened
long and drank deep while the wondrous picture grew, but the tense cord
at last snapped under the strain of the Murdstones and I broke into the
sobs of sympathy that disclosed my subterfuge. I was this time
effectively banished, but the ply then taken was ineffaceable. I
remember indeed just afterwards finding the sequel, in especial the vast
extrusion of the Micawbers, beyond my actual capacity; which took a few
years to grow adequate--years in which the general contagious
consciousness, and our own household response not least, breathed
heavily through Hard Times, Bleak House and Little Dorrit; the seeds of
acquaintance with Chuzzlewit and Dombey and Son, these coming thickly
on, I had found already sown. I was to feel that I had been born, born
to a rich awareness, under the very meridian; there sprouted in those
years no such other crop of ready references as the golden harvest of
Copperfield. Yet if I was to wait to achieve the happier of these
recognitions I had already pored over Oliver Twist--albeit now uncertain
of the relation borne by that experience to the incident just recalled.
When Oliver was new to me, at any rate, he was already old to my
betters; whose view of his particular adventures and exposures must have
been concerned, I think, moreover, in the fact of my public and lively
wonder about them. It was an exhibition deprecated--to infant innocence
I judge; unless indeed my remembrance of enjoying it only on the terms
of fitful snatches in another, though a kindred, house is due mainly to
the existence there of George Cruikshank's splendid form of the work,
of which our own foreground was clear. It perhaps even seemed to me more
Cruikshank's than Dickens's; it was a thing of such vividly terrible
images, and all marked with that peculiarity of Cruikshank that the
offered flowers or goodnesses, the scenes and figures intended to
comfort and cheer, present themselves under his hand as but more subtly
sinister, or more suggestively queer, than the frank badnesses and
horrors. The nice people and the happy moments, in the plates,
frightened me almost as much as the low and the awkward; which didn't
however make the volumes a source of attraction the less toward that
high and square old back-parlour just westward of Sixth Avenue (as we in
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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