_Heart._ Why really, Madam, I can't think of any Title better at present than the New Play Criticized, or the Plague of Envy. (_Enter_ FOOTMAN) _Foot._ Sir Charles Stanza and another Gentleman are come to wait on your Ladyship. _Lady._ Come Gentlemen, let us go and tell Sir Charles and the Author of our Design; so if you please, Mr. Canker, you may go along with us and be by at the Planning of our little Piece--No, I know his Envy won't suffer him to hear us compliment the Author. That would be out of Character, so we will leave him to consider of an Epilogue for our Farce. Rough Draft of an EPILOGUE (_Enter a_ POET _shabbily dressed_) Hissed, catcalled, and exploded to a man By those who cannot write, and those who can, How shall a recreant bard in nature's spight Save one poor piece, and live a second night? What--shall he try the arts of low grimace, Rant like old Bayes, and with a begging face Implore the patient monarchs of the Pit To let dull farce pass off for sterling Wit? No faith--his brother critics most he fears, And wisely waves the privilege of Peers-- Nor disapproves he less the threadbare plea Of wit in rags, and learned Poverty-- If, like a son of those bright nymphs, the Nine He e'er pr[o]fer a prayer at Phoebus' shrine, Ask him to dart one genial beam on Earth To hatch the Nothing of his Brain to birth, That prayer or never comes, or comes too late; The Nine still hold him illegitimate.-- In this Distress where next his application? Where, but to thee thou darling Goddess, Fashion! Fashion, the reigning Genius of today Whose verdict speaks the fate of each new play, Whose _mandate_ gives the power to save or kill, Lends Amoret her eyes and Ward his pill; If Fashion, mighty arbiter of merit, Allows it, right or wrong, some wit and spirit, Then shall this farce like other farces too Run eighteen nights or more and still be new; Each different night, a different audience meet, And Hawkers cry it up in evr'y Street. NB. This will damn the piece![8] NOTES TO THE PLAYS 1. Larpent ms 58 is dated April, 1746, in another hand and bears the following note to the Licenser: "April 15th, 1746. Sir, I have given Mrs. Macklin leave to act this farce for her Benefit provided it meets with the Approbation of my Lord Chamberlain. Your humble Servant. J. Lacy." 2. Smart is addressed as Dick in this speech in the ms. Three speeches later Rattle is addressed as Jack. Elsewhere in the ms. it is Jack Smart and Dick Rattle. 3. The following line, "You may feel it if you please." is crossed out in the ms. 4. The following phrase, "and most liable to be hurt" is crossed out in the ms.