Children of the rich -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Inheritance and succession -- Fiction
How she hated herself for what she had done! how gladly she would have
restored the money to its place upon the dead man's table! She
understood now what it had been doing there; doubtless it was the
amount which it was his custom to pay into the bank each quarter,
which it had been his intention to deliver on the morrow. God had
intervened on the one hand, the devil on the other; she had played the
devil's game;--fool! idiot! wretch that she had been! She realized
quite clearly that that money would never bring any good to her; that
it would lie like some obscene incubus on her whole life; even if she
bought a husband with the proceeds of her stealing, how could she
expect that such a marriage would be blest? The dressing-case itself
had become a sort of monomania; not only did she keep it locked, but
she hid it in her trunk and kept that locked; even then she was
continually haunted by fears that some one was taking liberties with
her property, as she had done with that of others. Suppose, by some
mischance, the secret of that false bottom was discovered, what would
happen then? She did not dare to think. What a fool she had been to
tell Herbert Nash that tale about the legacy. It was not only a
gratuitous, it was a foolish lie; she had seen that for herself almost
as soon as it was told. He had only to make the most superficial
inquiries, the falsehood would be discovered. She felt like biting her
tongue out every time she thought of it. Her only excuse was that she
had done it on the spur of the moment, without thinking; yielding to a
temptation which was stronger than her. If only she did not love him!
with so strange and violent a love that she had been willing to do
what she had done rather than that he should not love her, rather than
that she should not win him for her own! If, now, he were to find her
out--what she had done--for his sake, what would he think of her then?
But he should not find out; she would take care that he did not find
out; rather than he should find out she would continue as she had
begun, at whatever cost to herself, and to others.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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