"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
History
"Abe" Lincoln's Anecdotes and Stories: A Collection of the Best Stories Told by Lincoln Which Made Him Famous as America's Best Story Teller
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
When Abe Lincoln used to be drifting around the country, practicing
law in Fulton and Menard counties, Illinois, an old fellow met him
going to Lewiston, riding a horse which, while it was a serviceable
enough animal, was not of the kind to be truthfully called a fine
saddler. It was a weatherbeaten nag, patient and plodding, and it
toiled along with Abe--and Abe's books, tucked away in saddle-bags,
lay heavy on the horse's flank.
"Hello, Uncle Tommy," said Abe.
"Hello, Abe," responded Uncle Tommy. "I'm powerful glad to see ye,
Abe, fer I'm gwyne to have sumthin' fer ye at Lewiston co't, I reckon."
"How's that, Uncle Tommy?" said Abe.
"Well, Jim Adams, his land runs 'long o' mine, he's pesterin' me a
heap, an' I got to get the law on Jim, I reckon."
"Uncle Tommy, you haven't had any fights with Jim, have you?"
"No."
"He's a fair to middling neighbor, isn't he?"
"Only tollable, Abe."
"He's been a neighbor of yours for a long time, hasn't he?"
"Nigh on to fifteen year."
"Part of the time you get along all right, don't you?"
"I reckon we do, Abe."
"Well, now, Uncle Tommy, you see this horse of mine? He isn't as good
a horse as I could straddle, and I sometimes get out of patience with
him, but I know his faults. He does fairly well as horses go, and it
might take me a long time to get used to some other horse's faults.
For all horses have faults. You and Uncle Jimmy must put up with each
other, as I and my horse do with one another."
"I reckon, Abe," said Uncle Tommy, as he bit off about four ounces of
Missouri plug, "I reckon you're about right."
And Abe Lincoln, with a smile on his gaunt face, rode on toward
Lewiston.
=NO VANDERBILT=
In February, 1860, not long before his nomination for the Presidency,
Lincoln made several speeches in Eastern cities. To an Illinois
acquaintance, whom he met at the Astor House, in New York, he said:
"I have the cottage at Springfield, and about three thousand dollars
in money. If they make me Vice-President with Seward, as some say they
will, I hope I shall be able to increase it to twenty thousand, and
that is as much as any man ought to want."
=LINCOLN MISTAKEN FOR ONCE=
President Lincoln was compelled to acknowledge that he made at least
one mistake in "sizing up" men. One day a very dignified man called at
the White House, and Lincoln's heart fell when his visitor approached.
The latter was portly, his face was full of apparent anxiety, and
Lincoln was willing to wager a year's salary that he represented some
Society for the Easy and Speedy Repression of Rebellions.
The caller talked fluently, but at no time did he give advice or
suggest a way to put down the Confederacy. He was full of humor, told
a clever story or two, and was entirely self-possessed.
At length the President inquired, "You are a clergyman, are you not,
sir?"
"Not by a jug full," returned the stranger heartily.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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