It was Nuts for Claudine to assemble all of the Noblemen to be picked
up around the Lobby and give them a free run and jump at the Carte du
Jour.
Her Dinners soon became the talk of the Chambermaids employed at the
Hotel.
Any one willing to cut loose on Caviar and stuff raised under Glass
will never have to dine alone in gay Paree.
Whenever Elam made a noise like 1000 Frongs he found a lot of
well-bred Connoisseurs at his Elbow, all ready to have something
unusual brought up from the Cellar.
The securing of an Invitation to one of Claudine's formal Dinners was
almost as difficult as getting into Luna Park.
However, the list of guests sounded Real when sent back to America and
printed for the entertainment of persons living in Boarding-Houses.
Claudine became slightly puffed. When she found herself between a
couple of perfumed Lads wearing Medals she would give Friend Husband
the Office to move to one side and curl up in the Grass and not ruin
the Ensemble by butting in.
Elam was usually at the foot of the Table behind a mass of Orchids.
Once in a while he would try to crowd into the Conversation just to
let them know that old Ready Money was still present, but every time
he came up Dearie would do her blamedest to Bean him and put him out
of the Game.
Claudine could make a stab at the new Pictures in the Salon and even
run nimbly around the edge of the Futurist vogue.
Elam was ready to discuss Steamship Lines or Railway Accommodations,
but when he was put against the Tall Brows he began to burn low and
smell of the Wick.
Often, when surfeited with Truffles, he would wonder what had become
of the Green Corn, the K. and K., the regular Chicken with Giblets,
the Hot Cherry Pie, the smoking Oyster Stew, and the Smearcase with
Chives, such as Gusta used to send in.
These reminders of a lowly Past were very distasteful to Claudine.
Once he talked in his Sleep about Codfish Balls, and next morning she
lit on him something ramfugious.
After the Parisian triumphs it seemed a safe bet to return home and
make a new effort to mingle with the Face-Cards.
This time they took a House in New York and went after Grand Opera as
if they knew what it was about.
The Son of an Earl consented to Buttle for them. He refused them
Butter with their Meals and kept them trembling most of the time, but
they determined to do things Right, even if both died of Nervous
Prostration.
When they began making real Headway and were recognized in the Park by
some of the Headliners, Claudine would chide Elam for his early Doubts
and Fears.
"This has got the Middle West skinned forty ways from the Jack," she
would exclaim, gayly, as they motored up the Avenue. "Me for the White
Lights! It's a good thing you had a Pacemaker or you would now be
wearing detachable Cuffs and putting Sugar on your Lettuce."
Two years had elapsed since the escape from being Buried Alive.
They were, to all outward appearances, City-broke.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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