Autobiographical fiction; England -- Fiction; Feminist fiction; Governesses -- Fiction; Single women -- Fiction
With a little searching, I found these words in the fourth chapter.
When I came to the seventh verse she interrupted me, and, with needless
apologies for such a liberty, desired me to read it very slowly, that
she might take it all in, and dwell on every word; hoping I would
excuse her, as she was but a “simple body.”
“The wisest person,” I replied, “might think over each of these verses
for an hour, and be all the better for it; and I would rather read them
slowly than not.”
Accordingly, I finished the chapter as slowly as need be, and at the
same time as impressively as I could; my auditor listened most
attentively all the while, and sincerely thanked me when I had done. I
sat still about half a minute to give her time to reflect upon it;
when, somewhat to my surprise, she broke the pause by asking me how I
liked Mr. Weston?
“I don’t know,” I replied, a little startled by the suddenness of the
question; “I think he preaches very well.”
“Ay, he does so; and talks well too.”
“Does he?”
“He does. Maybe, you haven’t seen him—not to talk to him much, yet?”
“No, I never see any one to talk to—except the young ladies of the
Hall.”
“Ah; they’re nice, kind young ladies; but they can’t talk as he does.”
“Then he comes to see you, Nancy?”
“He does, Miss; and I’se thankful for it. He comes to see all us poor
bodies a deal ofter nor Maister Bligh, or th’ Rector ever did; an’ it’s
well he does, for he’s always welcome: we can’t say as much for th’
Rector—there is ’at says they’re fair feared on him. When he comes into
a house, they say he’s sure to find summut wrong, and begin a-calling
’em as soon as he crosses th’ doorstuns: but maybe he thinks it his
duty like to tell ’em what’s wrong. And very oft he comes o’ purpose to
reprove folk for not coming to church, or not kneeling an’ standing
when other folk does, or going to the Methody chapel, or summut o’ that
sort: but I can’t say ’at he ever fund much fault wi’ me. He came to
see me once or twice, afore Maister Weston come, when I was so ill
troubled in my mind; and as I had only very poor health besides, I made
bold to send for him—and he came right enough. I was sore distressed,
Miss Grey—thank God, it’s owered now—but when I took my Bible, I could
get no comfort of it at all. That very chapter ’at you’ve just been
reading troubled me as much as aught—‘He that loveth not, knoweth not
God.’ It seemed fearsome to me; for I felt that I loved neither God nor
man as I should do, and could not, if I tried ever so. And th’ chapter
afore, where it says,—‘He that is born of God cannot commit sin.’ And
another place where it says,—‘Love is the fulfilling of the Law.’ And
many, many others, Miss: I should fair weary you out, if I was to tell
them all. But all seemed to condemn me, and to show me ’at I was not in
the right way; and as I knew not how to get into it, I sent our Bill to
beg Maister Hatfield to be as kind as look in on me some day and when
he came, I telled him all my troubles.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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