Accendis, quare cupiam magis illi Proximus esse. Veils tantummodo: quae tua virtus, Expugnabis; & est qui vinci possit: eoque Difficiles aditus primos habet. Haud mihi deero, Muneribus servos corrumpam: non, hodie si Exclusus fuero, desistam: tempera quaeram: Occurram in triviis: deducam. Nil sine magno Vita labore dedit mortalibus. Haec dum agit, ecce Fuscus Aristius occurrit mihi carus, & illum Qui pulchre nosset. Consistimus. Unde venis? & Quo tendis? rogat, & respondet. Vellere coepi, Et prensare manu lentissima brachia, nutans, Distorquens oculos, ut me eriperet. Male salsus Ridens dissimulare: mecum jecur urere bilis. Certe nescio quid secreto velle loqui te Aiebas mecum. Memini bene; sed meliori Tempora dicam: hodie tricesima sabbata, vin'tu Curtis Judaeis oppedere? Nulla mihi, inquam, Religio est. At mi, sum paulo infirmior; unus Multorum ignosces; alias loquar. Hunccine solem Tam nigrum surrexe mihi: Fugit improbus, ac me Sub cultro linquit. Casu venit obvius illi Adversarius; &, Quo tu turpissime! magna Inclamat voce; &, Licet antestari? Ego vero Oppono auriculam; rapit in jus. Clamor utrinque Undique concursus. Sic me servavit _Apollo_. [Transcriber's Note: See end of _Essay_ for translation information.] The Intention of _Horace_ in this Piece, is to expose an _impertinent_ Fellow, and to give a ludicrous Detail of his own _Embarrassment_; Your Pleasure arises from the View which he gives you of his own Mortification, whereby he lays himself fairly open to your _Raillery_; This is the more poignant, and quick, from the real Distress which you see he endur'd, in this odd Attack; At the same Time the particular Turn of the Fellow, who chose in this Manner to pin himself upon another, is a very odd Species of impertinent _Humour_.--This Piece, as it stands, irresistibly forces your Mirth, and shakes you with Laughter; But to a Person of Discernment, it is chiefly at _Horace_'s Expence; Who in receiving and enduring such insolent Treatment, appears in a Light too low and ridiculous, though he has thought fit himself to exhibit the Scene again for the Diversion of the Public; The Misere, cupis, ---- abire, Jamdudum video, sed nil agis, usque tenebo, Persequar;-- was an absolute Insult; And very unfit to be related by the Person who suffer'd it, as a Matter of Merriment;--Besides this Tameness of _Horace_, the Impudence of the Fellow is excessively nauseous and disgusting at the Bottom, though the whole carries a Froth of _Raillery_ and _Humour_ upon the Surface.