Ancient, Curious, and Famous WillsHarris, Virgil M. (Virgil McClure)
History
Ancient, Curious, and Famous Wills
Harris, Virgil M. (Virgil McClure)
Wills
“To Hannah I give the bandbox she wanted and all the patchwork I leave
hoping she ‘will remember me, when it you see.’
“And now having disposed of my most valuable property I hope all will be
satisfied and not blame the dead. I forgive every one, and trust we may
all meet when the trump shall sound. Amen.
“To this will and testament I set my hand and seal on this 20th day of
Nov. Anni Domino 1861.
“AMY CURTIS MARCH.
“_Witnesses_: { ESTELLE VALNOR,
{ THEODORE LAURENCE.
“Postscript: I wish all my curls cut off, and given round to my friends.
I forgot it; but I want it done, though it will spoil my looks.”
THE WILL OF DON QUIXOTE
“I feel, good sirs,” said Don Quixote, “that death advances fast upon
me. Let us then be serious, and bring me a confessor, and a notary to
draw up my will, for a man in my state must not trifle with his soul.
Let the notary be sent for, I beseech you, while my friend here, the
priest, is taking my confession.”
The priest, having listened to his dying friend’s confession, came out
of the room and told them that the good Alonzo Quixano was near his end,
and certainly in his right senses; he therefore advised them to go in,
as it was full time that his will should be made. These tidings gave a
terrible stab to the overcharged hearts of the two ladies and his
faithful squire, whose eyes overflowed with weeping, and whose bosoms
had well-nigh burst with a thousand sighs and groans; for, indeed, it
must be owned, as we have somewhere observed, that whether in the
character of Alonzo Quixano the Good, or in the capacity of Don Quixote
de la Mancha, the poor gentleman had always exhibited marks of a
peaceable temper and agreeable demeanor, for which he was beloved, not
only by his own family, but also by all those who had the pleasure of
his acquaintance.
The notary entering the apartment with the rest of the company, wrote
the preamble of the will, in which Don Quixote disposed of his soul in
all the necessary Christian forms; then proceeding to the legacies, he
said:
“Item: Whereas, Sancho Panza, whom, in my madness, I made my squire, has
in his hands a certain sum of money for my use; and, as divers accounts,
disbursements, and pecuniary transactions have passed between us, it is
my will that he shall not be charged or brought to account for the said
money; but, if there be any overplus after he has deducted the payment
of what I owe him, the said overplus, which must be a mere trifle, shall
be his own, and much good may it do him; and as, during my disorder, I
contributed to his being made governor of an island, I would now, while
I enjoy my perfect senses, confer upon him, were it in my power, a whole
kingdom, which he richly deserves for the innocency of his heart and the
fidelity of his service.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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