Ann Arbor (Mich.) -- Fiction; Short stories, American
Little Green was one of these callers. He had expected the refusal of
admission which Mrs. Turner, with many apologies, gave him and
straightway he telegraphed his papers that Catherwood was dying as the
result of the great bodily injuries he had received at the hands of his
unknown undergraduate assailants. For little Green knew by instinct what
many a reporter requires long years to learn--that a "story" is "good"
just as long as there is a drop of "life" blood left in it, and not an
instant longer.
Little Green fairly reveled in the commotion he had caused. The regular
college correspondents, anæmic, frightened little fellows, were at a
loss to know who had beaten them in their own papers. It was little
Green's game, absolutely his, and he purposed playing it alone, aided
and abetted in the achievement of this purpose by the various telegraph
editors whom he sought to serve. And so far as the faculty was
concerned, the frequenter the dispatches, the more woefully addled did
the professorial brain become.
Out in the state, and in adjoining states, wise editors, looking down,
as it were, from some high place, wrote venomous and vicious editorials
in which the legislature was called upon to pass laws abolishing hazing
in institutions of the commonwealth by making the practice of it a
felony, punishable by imprisonment. Parents in the further west with
sons and daughters at Ann Arbor feared for their children's lives.
School boards passed resolutions. Guardians wrote to the heads of
various university departments asking if their wards were quite safe,
alone and unprotected in Ann Arbor. A New York newspaper, on the second
day, dispatched its most ingenious "woman reporter" to the scene of
action and in three hours the sprightly creature had woven a fictional
fabric beside which the tale of Ali Baba was the glowing, gleaming
truth. She revived all the half-forgotten stories of ancient hazing
rites, dead these many years, and wrote of them as of contemporary
practice. And the imaginative artist in the home office illustrated her
vivacious article elaborately, seeking to convey to the eye horrors of
undergraduate torture that words were useless to describe.
Skeletonized, the story was wired across the sea and the ponderous
_Times_ gave forth an editorial in which it averred that such refined
cruelty had never been heard of in English academic life; not even in
the palmiest days of Rugby and of Eton at the height of the fagging
system.
Amidst the wild excitement, little pink-cheeked Green grinned at his
reflection in his mirror and exclaimed:
"Gad! You've got 'em goin', Greeny; you've got 'em goin'. Greeny,
_you're it_!"
And he was; for three swift, brilliant days.
For then the president came.
He came unannounced save by the telegram the dean received at breakfast
on the second day.
He was driven direct to his home; and ten minutes after entering the
front door he issued from the back and hastened across the campus.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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