Byzantine Empire -- History -- John V Palaeologus, 1341-1391 -- Fiction; Zeno, Carlo, 1334-1418 -- Fiction
'No,' answered Zeno. 'You need not go and tell her what I have said,
for she has probably heard every word of it herself, from the window.
It is useless ever to tell women anything. They always know before
they are told.'
Thereupon Zeno went in, apparently in a bad temper. If anything can
make a woman angry when she is overhearing a conversation about
herself, it is to hear it said that she is undoubtedly listening. Zoë
had not hidden herself, and Zeno must have meant her to hear what he
was saying, but she felt the more deeply insulted. Her cheek burned,
and she drew back her veil to feel the cool air. So he had no
intention of coming to see her again! A Jewish doctor and an airing in
the boat, with Omobono for company! And she had been told that she had
been listening--it was not to be borne! She threw her veil on one
side, her silk shawl on the other, and then walked up and down the
long room with restless steps, like a young wild animal in a cage.
The little maids picked up the things and watched her uneasily, for
she had always seemed very gentle. They looked at her with wide eyes
now, and their gaze irritated her, till she felt that she wanted to
box their ears, and wished she had the negress's whip in her belt.
Then, without any apparent reason, she threw her arms round the one
that stood nearest and kissed the astonished girl a dozen times,
almost lifting her from the floor. As she let her go, she laughed
nervously at herself.
She was thirsty, and she drank off a tall glass of cold water at a
draught; and all the time she was unconsciously repeating one phrase
to herself.
'He shall pay me for this, he shall pay me for this!'
The words rang in her ears, to a sort of silly tune that would not go
away. There is a vile natural hurdy-gurdy somewhere in our brains, and
when we are angry, or in love, or broken-hearted, or otherwise beside
ourselves, it plays its absurd little tunes at us till we are ready to
go mad. I sometimes think that devil's music may have brought on the
final fatal irritation against life, that has decided the fate of many
half-mad suicides.
'He shall pay me for this!' She heard the words keeping time with her
movements; she walked slower--faster, but it made no difference, for
the infernal little notes took the beat from her steps.
She had not the least notion how Zeno was to pay for having made her
so very angry, and that question did not obtrude itself on her
thoughts till her temper was beginning to subside; then she suddenly
felt how utterly helpless she was, and her wrath boiled up again. The
only way of paying him out that suggested itself was to throw herself
out of the window. Then he would be sorry for what he had done.
Would he? He would probably send Omobono to have her corpse taken away
as quickly as possible. And the day after to-morrow he would go again
to see Giustina Polo in her father's house, and she would have thrown
herself out of the window for nothing. Besides, it would be wicked.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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