To-night he had left his proofs untouched on the writing-table, and had
settled himself comfortably to his pipe, with the voluptuous
satisfaction of a man who has put off a disagreeable duty. He felt that
delicious turmoil of ideas which with him accompanied the building up of
a story round its central character. Not that he yet understood that
character. Wyndham had his intuitions, but he was not the man to trust
them as such; it was his habit to verify them by a subsequent logic. His
literary conscience allowed nothing to take the place of the
experimental method, the careful observation, and arranging of minute
facts, intimate analytical study from the life. No action was too small,
no emotion too insignificant, for his uncompromising realism. He had
applied the same method to his own experience. Whatever came in his way,
the tragedy or comedy of his daily life, his moods of passion and
apathy, the aspirations of his better moments, all underwent the same
disintegrating process. He had the power of standing aloof from himself,
of arresting the flight of his own sensations, and criticising his own
actions as a disinterested spectator. Thus he made no experiment on
others that he had not first tried on his own person. If any man ever
understood himself, that man was Langley Wyndham. He was by no means
vain of this distinction; on the contrary, he would have said that as a
man's inner consciousness is the only thing he has any direct knowledge
of, he must be a fool if he can live with himself--the closest of all
human relations--for thirty-five years without understanding his own
character.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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