Often and often, while perfect silence prevailed among the nuns, at
meditation, or while nothing was to be heard except the voice of the
reader appointed for the day, no matter whose life or writings were
presented for our contemplations, Jane would break forth with some
remark or question, that would attract general attention, and often
cause a long and total interruption. Sometimes she would make some
harmless remark or inquiry aloud, as if through mere inadvertency, and
then her well-known voice, so strongly associated with every thing
singular and ridiculous, would arrest the attention of us all, and
generally incline us to smile, and even force us to laugh. The Superior
would then usually utter some hasty remonstrance, and many a time have
I heard her pronounce some penance upon her; but Jane had ever some
apology ready, or some reply calculated to irritate still farther, or
to prove to every one, that no punishment would be effectual on her.
Sometimes this singular woman would appear to be actuated by opposite
feelings and motives; for although she usually delighted in drawing
others into difficulty, and has thrown many a severe penance even upon
her greatest favourites; on other occasions she appeared totally
regardless of consequences herself, and preferred to take all the
blame, anxious only to shield others.
I have repeatedly known her to break silence in the community, as if
she had no object, or none beyond that of causing disturbance, or
exciting a smile, and as soon as it was noticed, exclaim: "Say it's me,
say it's me!"
Sometimes she would even expose herself to punishments in place of
another who was guilty; and thus I found it difficult fully to
understand her. In some cases she seemed decidedly out of her wits, as
the Superior and priests commonly preferred to represent her; but
generally I saw in her what prevented me from accounting her insane.
Among her most common tricks were such as these: She gave me the name
of the "Devout English Reader," because I was often appointed to make
the lecture to the English girls; and sometimes, after taking a seat
near me, under pretence of deafness, would whisper it in my hearing,
because she knew my want of self-command when excited to laughter. Thus
she often exposed me to penances for a breach of decorum, and set me to
biting my lips, to avoid laughing outright in the midst of a solemn
lecture. "Oh! you devout English Reader!" would sometimes come upon me
suddenly from her lips, with something in it so ludicrous that I had to
exert myself to the utmost to avoid observation.
This came so often at one time, that I grew uneasy, and told her I must
confess it, to unburden my conscience; I had not done so before,
because she would complain of me, for giving way to temptation.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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