"Let's go and touch him," said Berry excitedly. "Then we shan't get the
King's Evil. That's the origin of inoculation."
"I implore you," said Daphne, "to behave yourself. As a personal
favour----"
"You see in me," said her husband, "a huntleyed palmer seeking the tomb
of Anne of Cloves. On finding it, I must scourge myself. Anyone who
directs me to it will be assaulted."
"She's buried at Oranges," said Jonah. "But don't let that stop you."
Berry replaced his wideawake and stared at him.
"To mock me," he said, "is most dangerous. Several people have been
transformed for such an offence. Only yesterday I was compelled to
change a taxi-driver into a Gorgonzola of military age."
Several clocks struck the half-hour. Half-past two.
"Look here," said I. "We want to go to New College and 'The House,' but
we can't push off if you're going to come with us looking like that. For
Heaven's sake, go back to _The Mitre_ and get your own hat. Mr. Lewis,
won't you go and fix him up?"
Quick as a flash, Daphne threw her weight into the scale which I had
slung.
"Yes, do," she implored. "You know, you oughtn't to have let him come
out like that," she added, with a reproachful smile. "And then you can
join us a New College."
Our manoeuvre was successful beyond all expectation. His vanity
flattered, the gentleman addressed flung himself into the breach with
every manifestation of delight, and, seizing my brother-in-law by the
arm, haled him gleefully in the direction of The High, humouring his
obvious reluctance with the familiar assurances which one usually
associates with the persuasion of the unsober.
In silence we watched them till they had turned the corner. Then--
"Did I say New College?" said Daphne hurriedly.
"You did," said I. "So we'd better go straight to 'The House.'"
Three minutes later we were exploring my old rooms in Peckwater
Quadrangle, Christ Church.
* * * * *
In spite of its inauspicious beginning, we spent an enjoyable afternoon.
By common consent New College was ruled out of our itinerary, but Oxford
cannot be viewed in a day, and we found much to delight our senses south
of the High Street. Finally, a languorous journey by punt from the
Barges to Magdalen Bridge more than compensated us for the somnolent
half-hour which we had been proposing to spend under the shadow of the
City Wall.
Our return to _The Mitre_--a movement which was effected with great
caution--was eagerly awaited by the hall-porter, who inquired anxiously
regarding my brother-in-law, and produced his grey Homburg with a note
addressed _To the Owner_ stuck in the hatband.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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