Austria -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
She heard a clatter behind her; the waiter had come into the room. Bertha
ate but little, and drank her wine very quickly. She grew sleepy, and
leaned back in the corner of the divan. Her thoughts gradually grew
indistinct; there was a ringing in her ears like the echoes of the organ
which she had heard in the church. She shut her eyes and, all at once, as
though evoked by magic, she saw the room in which she had been with Emil
the previous evening, and behind the red curtains she perceived the
gleaming whiteness of the coverlet. It appeared that she herself was
sitting again before the piano, but another man was holding her in a
close embrace--it was her nephew Richard. With an effort she tore her
eyes open, she seemed to herself depraved beyond all measure, and she
felt panic-stricken as though some atonement would have to be exacted
from her, for these visionary fancies.
Once more she went to the window. She felt as if an eternity had passed
since she had sent the commissionaire on his errand. She read through
Emil's letter once again. Her glance lingered on the last words: "Ever
your own"; and she repeated them to herself aloud and in a tender tone,
and called to mind similar words which he had spoken the previous
evening. She concocted a letter which was surely on the point of arriving
and would certainly be couched in these terms: "My dearest Bertha! Heaven
be thanked that you are going to remain in Vienna until to-morrow! I
shall expect you for certain at my house at three o'clock," or:
"to-morrow we will spend the whole day together," or even; "I have put
off the appointment I had, so we can still see each other to-day. Come to
me at once; longingly I am waiting for you!"
Well, whatever his answer might be, she would see him again before
leaving Vienna, although not that day perhaps. Indeed, anything else was
quite unthinkable. Why, then, was she a prey to this dreadful agitation,
as though all were over between them? But why was his answer so long in
coming?... He had, in any case, gone out to dinner--of course, he
had no one to keep house for him! So the earliest that he could be home
again was three o'clock.... But if he were not to return home till the
evening?... She had, indeed, told the commissionaire to wait in any
case--even till the night, if necessary.... But what was she to do? Of
course, she could not stand there looking out of the window all the time!
The hours, indeed, seemed endless! She was ready to weep with impatience,
with despair!
She paced up and down the room; then she again stood at the window for a
while, then she sat down and took up for a short time the novel which she
had brought with her in her travelling bag; she attempted, too, to go to
sleep--but did not succeed in doing so. At length four o'clock
struck--nearly three hours had passed since she had begun her vigil.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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