As they walked, the boy remembered: the shadow of the plane out of
control above them, the plane striking the water, water becoming a
mountain of water, like shattered glass rushing at them across the sea.
And he remembered the fire.
Hadn't it really started in his room at the palace, when he pressed the
first of the concealed micro-switches with his heel? The cameras were
probably working, but there had been no bells, no sirens, no rush of
guards. It had tautened when he pushed the second switch in the jeweled
dolphin on his bedpost. It nearly snapped with metallic panic when he
had to maneuver the girl into position for the retina photograph.
_Nothing_ had happened. He was taken away, and his mother stayed quietly
in her room. What was supposed to happen was pulling further and
further away from the reality. How could anybody kidnap the Prince?
His treatment by the boy who told him about the sea and the girl who
taught him to fall pulled it even tighter. _If_ the Prince _were_
kidnaped, certainly his jailors should not tell him stories of beautiful
mornings and sunsets, or teach him to do impossible things with his
body.
He was sure that the girl had meant him to die when she had told him to
leap from the roof. But he had to do what he was told. He always had.
(He was following the giant through the dull leaves because the giant
had told him to.) When he had leapt from the roof, then rolled over and
sprung to his feet alive, the shock had turned the rack another notch
and he could feel the threads parting.
Perhaps if he had stayed there, talked more to the boy and girl, he
could have loosened the traction, pulled the fabric of reality back into
the shape of expectation. But then the man with the black hair and the
scarred giant had come to take him away. He'd made one last volitional
effort to bring "is" and "suppose" together. He'd told the man the story
of the mine prisoners, the one cogent, connected thing he remembered
from his immediate past, a real good "suppose" story. But the man turned
on him and said that "suppose" wasn't "suppose" at all, but "is." A
thread snapped here, another there.
(Over the deck of the boat there was roaring in the air. He had cried
out. Then shadow. Then water. His feet were slipping and the rail swung
by. Then thunder. Then screaming, his screaming: _I can't die! I'm not
supposed to die!_ Something tore in half.)
The leaves were shaking, the whole earth trembled with his tired,
unsteady legs. As they walked through the forest, the last filament
went, like a thread of glass under a blow-torch flame. The last thing to
flicker out, like the fading end of the white hot strand, was the memory
of someone, somewhere, entreating him not to forget something, not to
forget it no matter what ... but what it was, he wasn't sure.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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