I don't defend them. 'Twas a serious act, No doubt too much determined by the senses; (Alas! when these affinities attract, We lose the future in the present tenses!) Besides, the least establishment's a fact Involving nice adjustment of expenses; Moreover, too, reflection should reveal That not remote contingent--_la famille_. Yet these, maybe, were happy in their lot. Milton has said (and surely Milton knows) That after all, philosophy is "not,-- _Not_ harsh and crabbed, as dull fools suppose;" And some, no doubt, for Love's sake have forgot Much that is needful in this world of prose:-- Perchance 'twas so with these. But who shall say? Time has long since swept them and theirs away. [1] "Unwisely," surely. But 'tis well to mention That this particular is _not_ invention. THE WATER-CURE. A TALE: IN THE MANNER OF PRIOR. "--_portentaque Thessala rides?_" --Hor. "--_Thessalian portents do you flout?_" * * CARDENIO'S fortunes ne'er miscarried Until the day CARDENIO married. What then? the Nymph no doubt was young? She was: but yet--she had a tongue! Most women have, you seem to say. I grant it--in a different way. 'Twas not that organ half-divine, With which, Dear Friend, your spouse or mine, What time we seek our nightly pillows, Rebukes our easy peccadilloes: 'Twas not so tuneful, so composing; 'Twas louder and less often dozing; At _Ombre_, _Basset_, _Loo_, _Quadrille_, You heard it resonant and shrill; You heard it rising, rising yet Beyond SELINDA'S parroquet; You heard it rival and outdo The chair-men and the link-boy too; In short, wherever lungs perform, Like MARLBOROUGH, it rode the storm. So uncontrolled it came to be, CARDENIO feared his _chere amie_ (Like ECHO by _Cephissus_ shore) Would turn to voice and nothing more. That ('tis conceded) must be cured Which can't by practice be endured. CARDENIO, though he loved the maid, Grew daily more and more afraid; And since advice could not prevail (Reproof but seemed to fan the gale), A prudent man, he cast about To find some fitting nostrum out. What need to say that priceless drug Had not in any mine been dug? What need to say no skilful leech Could check that plethora of speech? Suffice it, that one lucky day CARDENIO tried--another way. A Hermit (there were hermits then; The most accessible of men!) Near _Vauxhall's_ sacred shade resided; In him, at length, our friend confided. (Simples, for show, he used to sell; But cast _Nativities_ as well.) Consulted, he looked wondrous wise; Then undertook the enterprise.