City and town life -- Fiction; Country life -- Fiction
Phil’s appetite departed at once: it seemed to him his life would
accompany it. His mind was in a daze; his heart was like lead. His
feelings reached his face, and, abstracted and stupid though he felt, he
could not help seeing that he was attracting attention, so he paid his
bill, went out, and hurried along the street. The first distinct
impression of which he was conscious was that there need no longer be
any doubt about how to say good-by to Lucia; a formal courteous note
would suffice: he would not trust himself to meet her. Could he blame
her? No: he certainly had no claim upon her heart, nor any reason to
really believe she had regarded him as more than a pleasant
acquaintance. She had let him kiss her hand; but had not she herself
taught him that this was merely an old-time form of salutation? She had
the right to marry whom she would; yet Marge---- The thought of that
man--that lazy, listless, cold, dry stick--being bound for life to a
merry, sensitive soul like Lucia drove him almost mad.
Well, the blow was a blessing in one way: now he could go back to the
farm without any fears or hesitation. Go back?--yes, he would hasten
back: he could not too soon put behind him the city and all its
memories. After all, it was not the city he had dreaded to leave; it was
Lucia, and whatever through her seemed necessary. Now that she must be
forgotten, all else might go. He would go back to the hotel, pack his
clothes,--how he longed for the money they had cost him!--write a line
to Lucia, and take the first train for home. Home! How shamefully he
had forgotten it in the past fortnight! Perhaps this disappointment was
his punishment: if so, although severe, it was no more than just. Home!
Why, he would rejoice to be once more inside his dirty oil-skin
fishing-clothes,--to obliterate the city man he had been aping for a
fortnight. Heaven had evidently intended him to be a drudge: well,
heaven’s will should be done.
Thus reasoned the spirit; but the flesh did not rapidly conform to its
leader’s will. Phil’s teeth and lips were twitching; he felt it was so;
he noticed that people stared at him, just as they did while he was in
the restaurant. This at least he could escape, and he would: so he
turned into the first side-street, to avoid the throng. Within a moment
he feared he was losing his reason, for it seemed to him that people
were pursuing him. There certainly was an unusual clatter of hurrying
feet behind him, but--pshaw!--it was probably a crowd running to a fire
or a fight. The noise increased; several wild yells arose, and some one
shouted, “Stop thief!” Then Phil’s heart stopped beating, for a heavy
hand fell on his shoulder. He started violently aside, but there was no
shaking off the grasp of that heavy hand: he looked wildly around, and
into the eyes of his father.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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