Deformities of Samuel Johnson, Selected from His WorksCallender, James Thomson
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Deformities of Samuel Johnson, Selected from His Works
Callender, James Thomson
Johnson, Samuel, 1709-1784 -- Criticism and interpretation
Of these words about forty only are proper, yet though they are so, and
though they are frequently to be found in the best authors, yet the
Doctor has not given any authority for them. His reading therefore must
have been very circumscribed, or his negligence very great. Is the word
_Avowee_, for instance, one of those which 'are however, to be yet
considered as resting only upon the credit of former dictionaries[143].'
Besides these forty, there are under letter A, some hundreds of the most
common words, for which no author's name is quoted. A gross omission
according to the plan which he lays down.
Let us put the case, that a foreigner sits down to compose a page of
English, by the help of Dr Johnson's work. The strange combinations of
letters (for I dare not call them words) which swell his book to its
present bloated size, are not marked with an asterisk, to distinguish
them as barbarous: The novice would therefore adopt a stile unknown to
any native of England. Here is a short specimen of what he would say.
'An _Admurmuration_ has long wandered about the world, that the
pensioner's political principles are _anfractuous_. Their
_anfractuousness_, their _insipience_, and their _turpitude_, are no
longer _amphibological_. His _nefarious repercussion_ of _obloquy_ must
_contaminate_, and _obumbrate_, and who can tell but it may even
_aberuncate_ his _feculent_ and _excrementitious celebrity_. His
_perspicacity_ will see without _comity_, or _hilarity_, that his
character as an author and a gentleman, requires _resuscitation_, for it
is neither _immane_ nor _immarcessible_. This is a _homogeneous_
truth[144]. Let him distend, like the _flaccid_ sides of a
football[145], his _sal_, his _sapience_, and his powers of
_ratiocination_. The _mellifluous_ and _numerose cadence_ of
_equiponderant_ periods cannot ensure him from a _luxation_, a
_laceration_, and a _resiliency_ of his _adminicular concatenation_ with
the _rugged mercantile_ race[146]. The loss of this _adscititious
adminicle_ would make the sage's _impeccable_, but _lugubrious_ bosom
vibrate with the horrors of _dilution_ and _dereliction_. His organs of
vision would gush with _salsamentarious_ torrents of spherical
particles, of equal diameters, and of equal specific gravities, as Dr
Cheyne observes--their smoothness--their sphericity--their frictions,
and their hardness,'[147] &c.
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