Finally, she called the question. By tradition, the votes were collected in secret and publicly tabulated over the data-channels. The group's eyes unfocussed as they called up HUDs and watched the totals as they rolled in. I was offline and unable to vote or watch. At length, Lil heaved a relieved sigh and smiled, dropping her hands behind her back. "All right then," she said, over the crowd's buzz. "Let's get to work." I stood up, saw Dan and Lil staring into each other's eyes, a meaningful glance between new lovers, and I saw red. Literally. My vision washed over pink, and a strobe pounded at the edges of my vision. I took two lumbering steps towards them and opened my mouth to say something horrible, and what came out was "Waaagh." My right side went numb and my leg slipped out from under me and I crashed to the floor. The slatted light from the shutters cast its way across my chest as I tried to struggle up with my left arm, and then it all went black. # I wasn't nuts after all. The doctor's office in the Main Street infirmary was clean and white and decorated with posters of Jiminy Cricket in doctors' whites with an outsized stethoscope. I came to on a hard pallet under a sign that reminded me to get a check-up twice a year, by gum! and I tried to bring my hands up to shield my eyes from the over bright light and the over- cheerful signage, and discovered that I couldn't move my arms. Further investigation revealed that this was because I was strapped down, in full-on four-point restraint. "Waaagh," I said again. Dan's worried face swam into my field of vision, along with a serious- looking doctor, apparent 70, with a Norman Rockwell face full of crow'sfeet and smile-lines. "Welcome back, Julius. I'm Doctor Pete," the doctor said, in a kindly voice that matched the face. Despite my recent disillusion with castmember bullshit, I found his schtick comforting. I slumped back against the palette while the doc shone lights in my eyes and consulted various diagnostic apparati. I bore it in stoic silence, too confounded by the horrible Waaagh sounds to attempt more speech. The doc would tell me what was going on when he was ready. "Does he need to be tied up still?" Dan asked, and I shook my head urgently. Being tied up wasn't my idea of a good time. The doc smiled kindly. "I think it's for the best, for now. Don't worry, Julius, we'll have you up and about soon enough." Dan protested, but stopped when the doc threatened to send him out of the room. He took my hand instead. My nose itched. I tried to ignore it, but it got worse and worse, until it was all I could think of, the flaming lance of itch that strobed at the tip of my nostril. Furiously, I wrinkled my face, rattled at my restraints. The doc absentmindedly noticed my gyrations and delicately scratched my nose with a gloved finger. The relief was fantastic. I just hoped my nuts didn't start itching anytime soon.