Women -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- England -- Fiction
They object, it seems, to meeting Brown on the stairs and landings, and
to the number of baths we have. Since we arrived there is never any hot
water left for washing their blouses. The climax came, apparently, this
morning. Brown goes into the bathroom about 7.30 a.m. and cleans the
bath. I saw him do it once at home, so I know what happens. He
sprinkles it all over with some powder in a tin, and then scrubs and
scours it till you’d think all the enamel would come off. And then he
washes it out with hot water and a brush on a long handle, and then
dries it, and cleans the taps, and wipes the floor, and puts out soap
and heaps of towels, turns the cold tap on and then goes along to Ross
and says ’Bath’s ready, sir.’
Then Ross goes and splashes it all up, and scatters soap about and
swamps the floor, and then, after breakfast, Brown cleans it just the
same all over again for me, only this time it’s the hot tap, and Nannie
comes and says ’Bath’s ready, dearie, hurry up now.’ What would Ross
say if Brown suddenly said, ’Hurry up, now, dearie,’ and if he wouldn’t
stand it, why do I?
Well, for some reason or other this morning Ross went along to his bath
before Brown called him. He had on his new dressing-gown. His taste is
lurid and flamboyant, and Aunt Constance aids and abets him. This was a
really scrummy one, dull purple silk, with pink flamingoes. And Aunt
Constance had had bath shoes made to match with baby flamingoes on the
toes. She does spoil him abominably.
Well, Ross, resplendent in his purple and flamingoes, lounged in a chair
and smoked a cigarette, while Brown put the last polish on the taps and
’chucked the towels about,’ as Ross expressed it. Brown was silently
absorbed in taps and Ross in watching him, when, suddenly, the door was
flung wide open and a Spider entered in a red flannel dressing-gown,
rather short, with a collar that had bits chewed out (I quote my
brother, he means pinked) while its feet were thrust in red felt shoes.
It had no cap on, but its hair was screwed into a tight, ’round button
on the top,’ like the panjandram, and it was in a temper hot and
hissing.
Ross got up hurriedly and surveyed the apparition, feeling a little at a
disadvantage, with his hair rough and with pink flamingoes. Brown stood
at petrified attention by the bath.
’Oh, is it possible,’ said the artist, for it was one of the sisters I
told you of, ’is it humanly possible that this room is _still_
occupied?’
’I’ve only just come,’ my brother remarked.
’But that man has been here at least half an hour,’ said the red flannel
dressing-gown.
’Have you, Brown?’ asked Ross.
’I’ve had to clean the bath, madam,’ said Brown.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account