Boarding schools -- England -- Fiction; Boys -- Fiction; Schools -- Fiction; Social classes -- England -- Fiction
“You may go,” said Mr. Thrale at length. “Your honesty has saved you.
Trevor next. I’ve heard about you, Trevor; kneel down, shirker!”
And the wily Trevor not only knelt with futile reluctance, but writhed
impotently during his castigation, though the eight strokes made half
the noise of the other eight; and once up he went his way serenely with
another wink at Jan.
Now by these days Jan had discovered that out of his pulpit Mr. Thrale
was sufficiently short and sharp of speech, rough and ready of humour,
with a trick of talking down to fellows in their own jargon as well as
over their heads in parables. “Sit down, Rutter, and next time you won’t
sit down so comfortably!” he had rapped out at Jan when the Middle
Remove went to construe to the Head Master early in the term. And it was
next time now.
Jan was left alone in the presence, and that instant became ashamed to
find he was already trembling. He had not trembled on the platform
before the whole school; his blood had been frozen then, now it was
bubbling in his veins. He was being looked at. That was all. He was
receiving such a look as he had never met before, a look from wide blue
eyes with hidden fires in them, and dilated nostrils underneath, and
under them a mouth that looked as though it would never, never open.
It did at last.
“Rebel!” said a voice of unutterable scorn. “Do you know what they do
with rebels, Rutter?”
“No, sir.”
It never occurred to Jan not to answer now.
“Shoot them! You deserve to be shot!”
Jan felt he did. The parable was not over his diminished head; it might
have been carefully concocted from uncanny knowledge of his inmost soul.
All the potential soldier in him—the reserve whom this General alone
called out—was shamed and humbled to the dust.
“You are not only a rebel,” the awful voice went on, “but a sulky rebel.
Some rebels are good men gone wrong; there’s some stuff in them; but a
sulky rebel is neither man nor devil, but carrion food for powder.”
Jan agreed with all his contrite heart; he had never seen himself in his
true colours before, had never known how vile it was to sulk; but now he
saw, and now he knew, and the firing-party could not have come too
quick.
The flogging judge had resumed his carved oak seat of judgment behind
the desk. Jan had not seen him do it—he had seen nothing but those
pregnant eyes and lips—but there he was, and in the act of putting his
homely weapon back in the desk. Jan could have groaned. He longed to
expiate his crime.
“Thrashing is too good for you,” the voice resumed. “Have you any good
reason to give me for keeping a sulky rebel in a standing army? Any
reason for not drumming him out?”
Drumming him out! Expelling him! Sending him back to the Norfolk
rectory, and thence very likely straight back to the nearest stables!
More light rushed over Jan. He had seen his enormity; now he saw his
life, what it had been, what it was, what it might be again.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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